Man Function

Any function that seems manly to a group of testosterone and beer fueled men such as a truck show, car show, boat show, RV show or and such visit to a bass pro shop. It works well with a large group of men, that way it doesnt look like a date

Person 1:Hey did you hear? Jasons organizing a Man Function!
Person 2: Hell Yea! I Love You Guys In A Totally Non Gay Way.
Person 1: Me Too, Now rub Me down with deer scent

by Johnny "The Answer" March 29, 2010

Functioning alcoholic

When one can be drunk every night and still be completely function able the next day

Nate went out every night this week and got totally shit faced. He still got to work the next morning at 8... He's a functioning alcoholic

by Tater tot 5190 June 30, 2014

Functioning Retard

One who is medically diagnosed as "Mentally Retarded" but manages to function at a normal level. While managing at a normal level that said person does things that would make other believe that he is a dumb-ass, dimwhit, or plaind old retard. See George W. Bush

Everything George W. Bush said during his speeches.

Some functioning retards managed to make their way to the top, president Bush did.

by CoUnMe April 21, 2010

function call

A phone call lasting about 10 seconds on usual and characterized by brief content, consisting of 3 essential parts:
1. Question
2. Answer
3. Hangup
A greeting and a farewell may or may not be included, depending on the situation as well as the callee.

The most important feature of a function call is the absolute lack of smalltalk. Omitting the usual "so what's up" part makes the conversation brief, effective and usually both less time- and cash-consuming compared to texting.
On the other hand, this fact may render function calling incompatible with most women due to their natural chitchat and gossip requirements.

The name is derived from the programming jargon due to the similarities to calling a function in a programming language, which usually includes specifying parameters and obtaining some kind of return value, close to immediately.

"Who was it?"
"Nothing important, just a function call from my buddy. He forgot my email address."

by Kosashi January 31, 2009

functioning addict

A person that has an addiction whether it be to alcohol or drugs and still able to maintain a "normal" life.

My boyfriend is a functioning addict. He can drink from the time he wakes up until the time he goes to bed and still is able to go to work.

by I Can Be Your Cutie April 12, 2008

functionally-retarded

Adjective describing a person(s) who has just enough brain cells to survive; devoid of common sense and mental aptitude.

Dave is such a tool. I bet he can't even wipe his own ass. He's functionally-retarded.

People suck. Most of the general public is functionally-retarded.

by Brett319 June 17, 2008

Functional alcoholic

Someone who can maintain an orderly, outward social appearance while their personal life has devolved into complete chaos due to over-drinking. Their friends and family are often impressed with their achievements, while the alcoholic knows that their drinking has lead to a full-blown loss of control and that it is just a matter of time until their behavior blows up in their face. In a bad way.

Emelio's friends/family: " Emelio is about to graduate med school. We are so proud. We only wish we could accomplish as much".

Emelio: "I am a functional alcoholic. Everyone I know thinks I'm doing great but in reality my brain has turned to slush. I can't believe I BS'd my way through med school and got a 3.8 GP because I don't remember any of it. I can't believe I'm almost 30 and have somehow avoided getting a DUI thus far. Everyone thinks I'm so great, but in reality, I'm totally fucking dangerous but I just haven't been caught yet. It's all catching up with me though. It's only a matter of time until I do something really stupid and everyone will realize what a fuck-up I truly am.

by ???s upon ???s September 1, 2016