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santa claus batteries

The poor quality batteries that arrive already installed in electronic toys that you'd recieve on Christmas. Typically green and red, gold and red, or any combination of the three. And ususally weighing about half of what a duracell, or energizer would weigh. Toshiba is a common brand of Santa Claus batteries
person 1- Dude, did you get barreries for the digital camera?

person 2- Yeah man. They're those silver ones, ya know, the kind with the black cat jumping through the number nine.

person 1- Oh fuck! Those are like santa claus batteries. They don't even have the power to turn the camera on!
by Buzzer December 23, 2007
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doing a Claudius

To pretend to be a dumb/weak/stuttering idiot, in order to fool your enemies

Comes from Emperor Claudius, who survived this way the tyrannical purges of Emperor Tiberius and the mad reign of Caligula.

Thus he was able to survive and become emperor himself in the end
Bill may seem like an harmless idiot, but he’s just doing a Claudius in order to fool Frank and fuck his girlfriend while he’s at work

Be careful with Tom, he may seem harmless, but he’s actually doing a Claudius
by EuropeanRando January 15, 2021
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Related Words

Claudiaa

Absolutely gorgeous girl. Whenever you see her, you can only stare. One who is sexy, smart, funny, attractive, and loves to have fun. Can be revered as the Party Queen. Is always loved by at least one special person. Is known to be the greatest girl on Earth...literally.
Wow! She is so claudiaa!
by Lil Zachy April 13, 2010
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Claudia

One of the kindest people who you will ever meet, and at the same time the funniest person you know! A claudia is such a funny outgoing person and also VERY pretty!
John: WOW!! (Claudia) is soo dayum pretty!
Alex: Yeah, she's also sooo funny, she cracks me up!!
Me: Guess whose asking her out tonight then...
by suchacoolboy September 18, 2012
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Jean Claude van Deuce

The most impressive of upright shitting postures, this elite maneuver is accomplished by placing one heel on the top of the toilet tank while standing over the bowl. Accuracy while straddling the toilet is key in placing the anus over the water.
Dude I just Jean Claude van Deuced upstairs and pulled a hip flexor.
by Jean Claude van deuce February 6, 2019
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Jean Claudio

Name of the only badass motherfucker that managed to beat off Chuck Norris and dickslaped more hos than Tiger Woods!
Dude, Jean Claudio just killed Chuck Norrys with a shadowkick to the head and banged all of the Kardashians a the same time! Even the dog!
by Sixkiller February 10, 2010
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Carl von Clausewitz

The Prussian military theorist who is widely acknowledged as the most important of the major strategic theorists. Even though he's been dead for over a century and a half, he remains the most frequently cited, the most controversial, and in many respects the most modern. His most notable work, Vom Kriege (On War), was unfinished at his death.
"To achieve victory we must mass our forces at the hub of all power and movement, the enemy's centre of gravity." - Carl von Clausewitz
by Dancing with Fire October 11, 2011
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