Swedish Telescope

Your partner wears swimming goggles, or other tight eye protection. You then drop a solid turd out of your ass onto their eye.

I gave her a swedish telescope and she told me she seen yellow stars. Must have been the corn I ate.

by Piero Sherpa September 4, 2005

Tuscaloosa Telescope

When someone inserts a paper towel tube in a man's anus and looks through it while tugging on the man's penis.

Ed's father walked in on him when he was receiving a Tuscaloosa Telescope from Chuck.

by CocoSantango July 26, 2014

dirty telescope

When you're fucking an asshole and get shit on your dick.

"I was barebacking that crack addict from the construction site in the ass for $10 and when she thought I came she pulled away from me and I saw that the nasty bitch gave me a dirty telescope".

by Democratic Republic of Doob February 2, 2017

Subaru Telescope

Subaru is an 8.2 meter (27.06 foot) optical-infrared telescope located at the summit of Maun Kea in Hawaii. It is operated by the National Astronomical Observatory of Japan (NAOJ). On the internet, visit www.naoj.org for more information.

The Subaru Telescope is one of the largest telescopes ever built.

by wichita July 3, 2006

the telescope

when being at an overcrowded location ( eg train, tram, bus ) you encounter a massive boner and thus the action of 'telescoping' must be employed. this means flippin your erect peepee out of your pants not forming a bulge in the crotch area, rather hiding it smugly paralell to your stomach, under your tshirt.

"Dude i had such a massive bone on the bus that i had to do a telescope!"

by vANis November 24, 2003

hubble telescope

An unusally large aperatus for the project at hand. Generally used in the medical and/or scientific fields, though not always. Refers to the famous space telescope that allows Earth scientists to see the farthest reaches of this galaxy and others.

Is more and more used to describe unusally large objects in general.

Event: Kelly sees Jon using a arch welder to light his cigarette.

Kelly says, "Look at Jon using the hubble telescope over there"

Event: Sam was in need of a biopsy and the instrument the doctor used was very big.

Sam says, "I don't know why you need the hubble telescope to see it"

Event: Tara noticed that Larry had very large hands.

Tara says, "Best be keeping your hubble telescopes away from me"

by TamTamInTheBay October 1, 2006

Indiana telescope

Taking a nice long turd in the eye for sexual gratification

Mike Pence got pink eye when Mother gave him the old Indiana telescope.

by Dot Biz October 8, 2020