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can't catch a break

Katia's phone always breaks, she always gets her stuff stolen and her bus lady hates her!
Katia can't catch a break!
by boomswag420420420 April 13, 2014
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couldn't catch shit in a diaper

1. An athlete who simply cannot catch the ball

2. A fisherman who has suffered through a rough day on the seas with nothing to show for his effort.

3. A guy who has absolutely no chance of succeeding in landing a girl when he hits the club at night.
1. Dwayne tracked the ball well enough, but since he couldn't catch shit in a diaper, he dropped the ball.

2. James couldn't catch shit in a diaper, and now his family has nothing to eat tonight.

3. Pat weighs in at about 350 pounds, so he couldn't catch shit in a diaper at the 9:30 Club.
by Joe Sam December 15, 2015
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You couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse

A more sexually explicit version of, "You couldn't catch a cold", meaning that someone is not good at catching anything.
Wally was so non-athletic, he couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse.

OR

Being pursued by bad guys: Can't you guys keep up? You couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse!
by GallopingSausage April 10, 2019
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T-Catty

Damn, T-Catty is a real nigga. The man gets hoes.
by Summer2019! June 14, 2019
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i don't catch

another meaning for 'i don't get it' or 'I don't understand'
karina: "lesbian"
lisa: "i don't catch"
by rated by 5 out of 5 dogs March 22, 2019
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You couldn't catch chicken pox in a henhouse!

A less explicit version of "You couldn't catch herpes in a whorehouse!" It means that no matter how hard they try, no one will be able to catch anything.
While a pack of dogs chased a cat, the cat insulted them by saying, "You couldn't catch chicken pox in a henhouse!"
by GallopingSausage April 15, 2019
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Don't go catchin herpes

What you tell your son or daughter before you know they are going to get a high on marijuana. Something you tell you boyfriend/girlfriend before you know they are going to smoke a blunt. Something you tell your friend before he hooks up with rando at the bar.
Hey johnny, don't go catchin herpes now.
Hey bri, be home by twelve, and don't go catchin herpes.

I know your cheating on me, but I still love you, but don't go catchin herpes.
by SsTtUu00 June 20, 2011
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