there was an old lady who swallowed a fly

one of the darkest children's stories ever that ends every verse with the words "Perhaps She'll Die", with the exception of the very end where the old lady is finally dead

Guy 1: Did you hear how there was an old lady who swallowed a fly?
Guy 2: No what happened to her?
Guy 1: She died
Guy 2: Why did nobody help her?
Guy 1: She died after she ate the horse.
Guy 2: Wtf!

by hitman_penguin May 7, 2013

load that should have been swallowed

the ultimate loser. he/she has the uncanny knack of spectactularly fucking-up everything that is good in their lives - from 1st day at school to 1st kiss to 1st shag to 1st job to 1st marriage to 1st child's life to.....

you know who you are ;~) he's pissed and making an tit of himself again whilst his kids can't afford to wipe their arses - the man's a "load that should have been swallowed."

by Alistair Murray October 23, 2008

should have swallowed

An unwanted pregnacy

Yep I am preggers. I should have swallowed

by Kitty Vicuna April 13, 2008

swallowed in the sea

the best coldplay song ever. It talkes about a guy and a girl and how the sea seems to have taken away one of them.

the streets your walking on,
a thousand houses long,
well thats where i belong,
and you belong with me,
not swallowed in the sea.

by Janiya January 12, 2009

Stalloned

When an individual has become so intoxicated, usually with a combination of alcohol and marijuana, that they begin to resemble Sylvester Stallone in speech and appearance.

Symptoms include: slurred speech, being exceedingly difficult to understand, and drooping of lower lip or eyelids giving the impression of partial face paralysis.

Onlooker:"Hey everybody, Joel is Stalloned!"

Joel: "Meh.... Dawhy is duuuhbeer guh duh dere?..... Yo Adrian... uuuuh... beer"

by ThaMoxie February 18, 2010

Swallowed the gun

To put a gun in your mouth to shoot yourself..

Did you hear about Bob, he went out in the woods with his .45 pistol and swallowed the gun.. I heard it was a really bad scene when the cops found him.

by Apathy&Angst February 28, 2012

scalloped

if you rub your hand over your tire and it's not round. there is almost like a wave around the tire

I find that certain brands of tires are more prone to "scallop-ing" than others.

by JPSmack May 24, 2005