The funniest thing on the internet. Also, the person above me is a large fucktard, as there is no motion capture in RvB. Eat it, cockbite.
"I went to Red vs. Blue and watched episode 2 thrity times before returning to wanking to Morrigan hentai"
by Sarge October 22, 2003
^go eat your steroids douchebag
An internet series that brought widespread acceptance to Machinima, it utilises the bungee games "halo: combat evolved" and "Halo 2" to act out scripts written by ametuer comdeians.
Or, in short, the meaning of life.
An internet series that brought widespread acceptance to Machinima, it utilises the bungee games "halo: combat evolved" and "Halo 2" to act out scripts written by ametuer comdeians.
Or, in short, the meaning of life.
by Inquisition November 30, 2006
From Episode 4 of Red Vs Blue, funniest quote IMO.
Church: Ya, I'll let 'cha in on a little secret. I've ah, I've actually got a girl back home.
Tucker: Oh ya? Girlfriend or wife?
Church: No, man, she's just my girlfriend. You know, we were gonna get married, but I got shipped out, and, ah, you know how it works.
Tucker: Oh, well, are you gonna marry her when you get back?
Caboose: I'm not gonna get married. My dad always said, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"
Church: Hey rookie, did you just call my girlfriend a cow?
Tucker: Naw, I think he just called her a slut.
Church: I'll tell you what noob, I could sit out here and listen to you insult my girlfriend all day long, but as it turns out, I've got an a much more important job for you to do.
Caboose: Great...
Church: See, we got this General..
Tucker: Right, the General guy.
Church: Who likes to come by, and make random inspections of bases. So what I'm gonna have you do, is I'm gonna have you go in the base, and stand right next to the flag at attention. Just incase he decides to come by.
Caboose: When is he stopping by?
Tucker: We never know, could be today, could be a week from now.
Caboose: You want me to stand at attention for a week?
Church: You know, you don't sound very grateful. This is the most important job at the whole base. You're gonna be right there with the flag.
Caboose: What's so important about the flag?
Church: Oh come on, don't they teach you guys anything at training?
Caboose: They didn't tell us anything about a flag. Why is it so important?
Church: Because it's the flag. Man you know the it's the flag. Tucker, you tell him why the flag is so important.
Tucker: Well it's-it's complicated. Its blue, we're blue.
Church: It's just important, okay? Trust us. So when the general comes by, the first thing he's gonna want to do is inspect the flag.
Tucker: Right..
Church: So just go in there you know faraway from us and wait for him.
Caboose: How will I know when I see him?
Tucker: There's only three of us out here, rookie, he's the one new guy that doesn't look like one of us.
Church: Now get in there and don't come out. Man, that guy is dumber then you are.
Tucker: You mean, he's dumber than you are.
Church: Wow, Tucker, that was a great comeback
Caboose: Uhh.. Mr. Church sir!
Church: Oh my god. WHAT? Tucker I swear I'm gonna kill him.
Caboose: Sorry a-about calling your girlfriend a slut.
Church: ROOKIE! SHUT UP JUST SHUT UP, YOU'RE DRIVING ME CRAZY GET IN THERE!
Tucker: Hah hah hah ha
Church: Tucker, are you laughing at me?
Donut: Excuse me, sir. Can I ask you a question?
Church: Dear God in Heaven, rookie, if I turn around and you are not inside... I- I can't be held responsible for what I'm gonna do to you.
Donut: What did I do?
Church: One...
Donut: Aw.. give me a break.
Church: Two..
Donut: Fine!
Church: Ya, I'll let 'cha in on a little secret. I've ah, I've actually got a girl back home.
Tucker: Oh ya? Girlfriend or wife?
Church: No, man, she's just my girlfriend. You know, we were gonna get married, but I got shipped out, and, ah, you know how it works.
Tucker: Oh, well, are you gonna marry her when you get back?
Caboose: I'm not gonna get married. My dad always said, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"
Church: Hey rookie, did you just call my girlfriend a cow?
Tucker: Naw, I think he just called her a slut.
Church: I'll tell you what noob, I could sit out here and listen to you insult my girlfriend all day long, but as it turns out, I've got an a much more important job for you to do.
Caboose: Great...
Church: See, we got this General..
Tucker: Right, the General guy.
Church: Who likes to come by, and make random inspections of bases. So what I'm gonna have you do, is I'm gonna have you go in the base, and stand right next to the flag at attention. Just incase he decides to come by.
Caboose: When is he stopping by?
Tucker: We never know, could be today, could be a week from now.
Caboose: You want me to stand at attention for a week?
Church: You know, you don't sound very grateful. This is the most important job at the whole base. You're gonna be right there with the flag.
Caboose: What's so important about the flag?
Church: Oh come on, don't they teach you guys anything at training?
Caboose: They didn't tell us anything about a flag. Why is it so important?
Church: Because it's the flag. Man you know the it's the flag. Tucker, you tell him why the flag is so important.
Tucker: Well it's-it's complicated. Its blue, we're blue.
Church: It's just important, okay? Trust us. So when the general comes by, the first thing he's gonna want to do is inspect the flag.
Tucker: Right..
Church: So just go in there you know faraway from us and wait for him.
Caboose: How will I know when I see him?
Tucker: There's only three of us out here, rookie, he's the one new guy that doesn't look like one of us.
Church: Now get in there and don't come out. Man, that guy is dumber then you are.
Tucker: You mean, he's dumber than you are.
Church: Wow, Tucker, that was a great comeback
Caboose: Uhh.. Mr. Church sir!
Church: Oh my god. WHAT? Tucker I swear I'm gonna kill him.
Caboose: Sorry a-about calling your girlfriend a slut.
Church: ROOKIE! SHUT UP JUST SHUT UP, YOU'RE DRIVING ME CRAZY GET IN THERE!
Tucker: Hah hah hah ha
Church: Tucker, are you laughing at me?
Donut: Excuse me, sir. Can I ask you a question?
Church: Dear God in Heaven, rookie, if I turn around and you are not inside... I- I can't be held responsible for what I'm gonna do to you.
Donut: What did I do?
Church: One...
Donut: Aw.. give me a break.
Church: Two..
Donut: Fine!
by Rich dude October 19, 2007
1. Some kind of political thing.
2. One of the best (note: your mileage may vary) machinimas out there, and better than more than half the stuff on television. Featuring at the beginning two teams fighting over a useless canyon, over time it grew into something more. In RvB: The Blood Gulch Chronicles, they start out, you get comfortable with the characters, the rookies are introduced, then Tex, Church's ex girlfriend comes in. She kills Pvt. Franklin Delano Donut, the Red rookie. Later, "Doc" DuFresne comes in and heals both teams. Before the Reds and Blues try to save Church and Griff and stop O'Malley(an AI), who has taken over Doc, hired a dangerous freelancer from Tex's past (Agent Wyoming), and of course convinced the Reds' robot, Lopez, to join them. After a freak accident with the weather machine (you have to see it) the everyone but Church is sent to the future (in Halo 2 maps), while he is sent to the past (Marathon maps). Church tries to fix the bad things that happen in Blood Gulch, but ends up causing them. He eventually gets back to the future (not the movie lol) and eventually the Reds and Blues find the future version of Blood Gulch, and crazy shit goes on. Tucker gets impregnated by an alien, has a baby, Griff's sister comes and joins the Blue Team and in the end.... You have to see it. No, seriously. I can't tell you the awesomeness and funny in this. It'd be kinda like dividing by zero. Later there are more series, but I have no more room. Alas...
2. One of the best (note: your mileage may vary) machinimas out there, and better than more than half the stuff on television. Featuring at the beginning two teams fighting over a useless canyon, over time it grew into something more. In RvB: The Blood Gulch Chronicles, they start out, you get comfortable with the characters, the rookies are introduced, then Tex, Church's ex girlfriend comes in. She kills Pvt. Franklin Delano Donut, the Red rookie. Later, "Doc" DuFresne comes in and heals both teams. Before the Reds and Blues try to save Church and Griff and stop O'Malley(an AI), who has taken over Doc, hired a dangerous freelancer from Tex's past (Agent Wyoming), and of course convinced the Reds' robot, Lopez, to join them. After a freak accident with the weather machine (you have to see it) the everyone but Church is sent to the future (in Halo 2 maps), while he is sent to the past (Marathon maps). Church tries to fix the bad things that happen in Blood Gulch, but ends up causing them. He eventually gets back to the future (not the movie lol) and eventually the Reds and Blues find the future version of Blood Gulch, and crazy shit goes on. Tucker gets impregnated by an alien, has a baby, Griff's sister comes and joins the Blue Team and in the end.... You have to see it. No, seriously. I can't tell you the awesomeness and funny in this. It'd be kinda like dividing by zero. Later there are more series, but I have no more room. Alas...
Some Red VS Blue quotes:
Sarge: Ah!!! Repent! Repent!
Donut: Sarge, you're not in hell!
Simmons: Griff and I are on a peninsula-
Sarge: YOU'RE ON GRIFF'S WHAT!?
Simmons:We're on a LEDGE! PENINSULAR LEDGE!
Doc: You'd be surprised what Caboose'll do for a cookie and some juice!
Caboose: Church... If I die... I want you to have my cookie!
Sarge: Ah!!! Repent! Repent!
Donut: Sarge, you're not in hell!
Simmons: Griff and I are on a peninsula-
Sarge: YOU'RE ON GRIFF'S WHAT!?
Simmons:We're on a LEDGE! PENINSULAR LEDGE!
Doc: You'd be surprised what Caboose'll do for a cookie and some juice!
Caboose: Church... If I die... I want you to have my cookie!
by Darth Anonyseudonym January 03, 2010
One of the best internet shows going created by placing pre recorded vocals over Halo gameplay however CGI is mixed in with machinima elements in the later seasons.
Seasons 1 - 5
Revolve around two groups of soliders engaged in a civil war between Red Team and Blue Team.
The Red Team consists of Sarge, Simmons, Grif & Donut while Blue Team members are Church, Tucker, Caboose however early on hire a mercenary called Tex to join their ranks.
Seasons 6 - 8
Adding on to the story already set in the previous seasons both teams with the aid of Agent Washington are united in order to face a common enemy The Meta. Subtle hints in the previous seasons also come together to announce a big revelation about one of the main characters.
Seasons 9 - 10
Provides more of a backstory on Project Freelancer while also keeping us informed with current on goings between Red and Blue Team.
That was a brief introduction to the epicness of Red vs Blue also known as RvB and you should watch it for yourself at www.Roosterteeth.com.
Seasons 1 - 5
Revolve around two groups of soliders engaged in a civil war between Red Team and Blue Team.
The Red Team consists of Sarge, Simmons, Grif & Donut while Blue Team members are Church, Tucker, Caboose however early on hire a mercenary called Tex to join their ranks.
Seasons 6 - 8
Adding on to the story already set in the previous seasons both teams with the aid of Agent Washington are united in order to face a common enemy The Meta. Subtle hints in the previous seasons also come together to announce a big revelation about one of the main characters.
Seasons 9 - 10
Provides more of a backstory on Project Freelancer while also keeping us informed with current on goings between Red and Blue Team.
That was a brief introduction to the epicness of Red vs Blue also known as RvB and you should watch it for yourself at www.Roosterteeth.com.
Tell me why you're here, do you even know yourself?
Do you belong here? You don't fit anywhere else...
Don't feel betrayed, only we can wipe the slate clean,
Does it even matter? It only matters that we're here...
Were you right to... Give your life to...
Someone else to (run it for you?)
Do you wish you... Kept your life too...?
Good to conquer evil,
Lies to fight the truth,
Are any of us only saints or sinners,
Or is it always...
Red vs Blue?
- Red vs Blue OST
Jeff Williams
Do you belong here? You don't fit anywhere else...
Don't feel betrayed, only we can wipe the slate clean,
Does it even matter? It only matters that we're here...
Were you right to... Give your life to...
Someone else to (run it for you?)
Do you wish you... Kept your life too...?
Good to conquer evil,
Lies to fight the truth,
Are any of us only saints or sinners,
Or is it always...
Red vs Blue?
- Red vs Blue OST
Jeff Williams
by Damn Wench October 25, 2012
by Hawk Studios Gaming September 26, 2017