phantom shit

A phantom shit is a sizeable dump usually laid under cover of darkness in a public place. When stumbled upon in daylight by an unsuspecting individual, hilarity is meant to ensue.
Less frequently referred to as a ghost shit, the phantom shit usually shows up in such places as post boxes, car hoods, children's playgrounds, and any general public place ripe for mischief.

I took my son to the playground on Saturday morning and he slid down the tube slide right into a pile of crap; some fucking punk must have laid down a phantom shit there on Friday night.

by timboooo September 3, 2006

phantom shit

When one has strived for ages to release a turd, and has felt one has done a big shit, but on inspection there is little or no shite in the pan.

fuck me, i thought id shat a baby but it turned out to be a phantom shit

by Barclay - whos first name is too embarrasing April 29, 2008

Phantom Shit Perfecto

A shit which leaves behind no trace. When you wipe your arse you find that it's clean, and when you look in the toilet nothing is there. You're left wondering if you actually had a shit.

- I had a shit perfecto this morning. My arse was as clean as a polished sixpence.
- That's nothing. I had a phantom shit perfecto earlier. I didn't even have to flush.

- In heaven, every shit is a shit perfecto.

by greenlectern September 1, 2010

phantom shit bandit

A person with an ass so big they would need mirrors to back into the stall visits a public/office restroom and defecates the messiest sloppiest nutty dump all over seat and floor. They always manage to slip away without be noticed, despite HOW big they are.

MY god the phantom shit bandit strikes again. My good it is all over the walls too.

by dontbah8tr February 27, 2009

shit phantom

when a party-goer uses the bathroom, turns off the water to the toilet (via knob below the toilet bowl), flushes the toilet until the water no longer runs, then proceeds to shit in the toilet.

The shit phantom struck again at Jay C's house.

by Mike B. and Mike V. January 8, 2008

Phantom shit

When you drop a huge log in the toilet, but when you go to wipe there’s nothing there

I washed my hands and everything, it was just a phantom shit

by The shitburgular February 11, 2019

Phantom Shit

when you go to the bathroom, complain about shit being there in the toilet, you ask everyone, and then no one admits to shitting there.

Bruh i was trying to pee but then i saw a phantom shit that i didnt even put

by kastie1288thepro December 23, 2021