A young male who will give up countless hours of his time listening to the problems of his very attractive female friends because they need someone to talk to about their apathetic, Baywatch jock of a boyfriend because no one else will listen or genuinely care. Although always surrounded by beautiful girls the nice guy can’t get a girlfriend or even facilitate the alleviation of certain “drives” because his “ordinary” physical appearance will forever be compared to the Baywatch beach bum’s. The nice guy would never capitalize on a vulnerable girl, objectify or cheat on a girl, he will go out of his way and bend over backwards to help his “friends” and will never ask for anything in return but no matter how intelligent, understanding, humorous, compassionate, trusting or loyal the nice guy is the female cohort will always pass him up and endure any length of abuse, objectification, apathy and cold-heartedness from a man if he has physical attractiveness, fashion, big muscles and chiseled facial features.
The nice guy will eventually realize that his dependability and empathy will never be appreciated and all his friendships with females are all one-sided. This coupled with years of watching girls go for tanned, muscular jerk-offs with nice cars while he desperately hopes someone will realize that how viable he actually is will spawn and incubate the nice guy’s insecurities and he will eventually abandon his views, dumb-down his speech, take-up weight-lifting and switch majors from cancer research with a minor in theoretical physics to playground management so he can devote his time to emulating Baywatch characters and football players so that he will one day be viewed as more than a “nice guy.”
The nice guy will eventually work up the courage to ask out his attractive female friend but will invariably be turned down because she’s so self-centered that she’d never actually had a smidgeon of compassion for the nice guy’s feelings or even realized that he’s interested in girls. After rejecting the nice guy, the girl will downplay the supposed friendship to the point where they never speak again, which in turn will make the nice guy depressed (ironically, he won’t have anyone to talk to) because he’s devoted so much time and energy and has become so warped from being exposed to these kinds of people that he will either live the rest of his life alone in a tiny apartment, jerking off to old Saved by the Bell episodes or get drunk one night and impregnate a 300-pound, cross-eyed derelict who works at Wendy’s and spend the rest of his life being treated like shit.
The whole ‘nice guy’ phenomenon really supports the idea that people primarily care about physical appearances and that shrewdness, selfishness and narcissism will always triumph over compassion, rapport and “inner beauty.”
"Jeez Patrick, I hope I can find a nice guy like you someday."
"Well, if you need me I'll be at home, crying myself to sleep while masturbating to the sound of my 70-year-old neighbors having sex...I might also play some ps2."
"Well, if you need me I'll be at home, crying myself to sleep while masturbating to the sound of my 70-year-old neighbors having sex...I might also play some ps2."
by desperryado October 04, 2005
The guy who never gets the girl; he who finishes last; thou who art nice shall get screwed; Anyone who goes out of their way to help someone and gets screwed for it; the guy who likes the girl listens to her after the break-up and then is forgotten until she is dumped again.
Example of The Nice Guy rule in action: In England, there was a bank robbery and the robber couldn't open the front door, because his hands were full of money, an innocent bystander is walking by and sees the man struggling with the door and holds it open for him, that man was arrested for assisting an armed robbery.
by The_Nice_Guy September 01, 2009
by D February 17, 2004
someone who is very sweet and does things for someone else even if it is a draw back for theirselves.
by Im not really sure what my name is at the moment.. October 19, 2003
the person every girl will compare their would-be boyfriends to, for they possess every trait a woman desires. However, for whatever reason, women avoid them like the plague.
by ares1013 March 12, 2005
A man who is to afraid to speak his mind. Often times they will complain about how they are mistreated by women and hate the "Alpha's", "Frat Guy" ,"Athletes" and label them as troglodytes. What the nice guys fail to realize, is they are weak at a fundamental level. They only befriend the girls who are attractive because they have hopes that the friendship will result in sex or relationship. They kling on to these attractive woman because they do not have enough confidence in themselves to say they deserve more and better from these relationships. The pandering fool often is depressed because though he feels that he is close to the girl, he understands fundamentally the woman will not grow to like him. This is because girls are attracted to confidence on a very basic level. The obsequious ways of the nice guy are the embodiment of lack of confidence and self loathing. Nice guys do not strive to be jerks but good men. The difference in the two paradigms is this, nice guys do what they do to receive validation and praise, good men do what they want because they want to. Good men are truthful, honest and blunt.
by Thelonious Kwiggz August 11, 2012