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keyser soze

STOP!
Unless you want the ending of a GREAT movie spoiled for you, DO NOT read any of the definitions below. The Usual Suspects is probably one of the best mysteries ever. If I were to make a list of the best crme films of the 90's it would rank number 2 (just under Pulp Fiction). The character Keyser Soze is a rarely seen, nearly mythical crime kingpin who is involved in drugs, murder, and possibly international terrorism (as hinted in one scene). Most believe he is not real, but rather boogeyman story or name-drop to intimidate people. In the end of the movie, the shocking identity of Keyser Soze is finally revealed. Go watch The Usual Suspects and see it for yourself. Do not let this great ending get ruined for you!
The background story of Keyser Soze as told by the character Verbal Kint:

"He's supposed to be Turkish. Some say his father was German. Nobody ever believed he was real. Nobody ever knew him or saw anybody that ever worked directly for him. But to hear Kobayashi tell it, anybody could have worked for Soze. You never knew; that was his power. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
One story the guys told me, the story I believe, was from his days in Turkey. There was a gang of Hungarians that wanted their own mob. They realized that to be in power, you didn't need guns or money or even numbers. You just needed the will to do what the other guy wouldn't. After a while, they come into power and then they come after Soze. He was small-time then, just running dope, they say. (We see all of this in flashback) They come to his home in the afternoon, looking for his business. They find his wife and kids in the house and decide to wait for Soze. He comes home to find his wife raped and children screaming. The Hungarians knew Soze was tough, not to be trifled with, so they let him know they meant business.
(Flashback: Hungarian cuts one of the children's throats)
They tell him they want his territory, all his business. Soze looks over the faces of his family. Then he showed these men of will what will really was.
(Soze shoots two Hungarians, then shoots his children and his wife as the last Hungarian watches in surprised horror)
He tells him he would rather see his family dead than live another day after this. He lets the last Hungarian go, waits until his wife and kids are in the ground, and then he goes after the rest of the mob. He kills their kids. He kills their wives. He kills their parents and their parents' friends. He burns down the houses they live in, the stores they work in. He kills people that owe them money. And like that, he's gone. Underground. Nobody's ever seen him since. He becomes a myth, a spook story that criminals tell their kids at night. 'Rat on your pop and Keyser Soze will get you.' But no one ever really believes."
by Cthulhu February 6, 2005
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Keistering

To hide or smuggle items in ones anus
Goodman figured keistering the dildo would be just the trick to avoid detection by store security
by KC Is A Knob Gobbler April 21, 2009
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Kester

A guy who is a friend to everyone. He has a likeable, easy-going personality. He has a lot of enthusiasm, and tries to live life with a smile, even if he doesn't feel like it. Despite this, Kester is a genuine guy. He isn't afraid to be honest about his feelings, and he will ask for help when he needs it. Out of consideration, however, he tries to be brief with what he says. He wants to listen to others, instead of focusing on himself. But when his friends need help, he is always there to aid them with advice. Whenever he shows up, people are quick to notice. Many give him a big welcome.
Me: "Hey, there's Kester."

Friend: "Oh, really?"

Us: "Hey, Kester!"
by hatless hair May 7, 2018
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keister stash

A popular hiding place for contraband such as drugs, especially in prison. The anus. Usually the contraband is wrapped in a condom.
Johnny kept is smack in a keister stash.
by veritone January 16, 2009
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Keester Kiss

An imprint left on bedsheets as a result of the failure to sufficiently wipe your ass before sitting on a bed naked.
It was evident that Bill forgot to wipe as seen by the keester kiss left on the sheets.
by Tim Boniface March 30, 2005
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keaster

put in your ass to hide or hold...
where do you stash your dope when your driving? i keaster it...
by mrfnk November 21, 2009
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keestering

Keestering is the act of placing an item or items in your anus to transport to another location without detection.
When keestering the shank before going to the yard for rec time, a gentle hand is best.
by Ef4 January 15, 2016
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