The coomer (Pronounced COOM-er) is an elusive creature. It is on the list of critically endangered species and was once thought to be a myth due to the rarity of these beasts. They are said to be primarily solitary creatures, though at least half a dozen confirmed sightings of coomers in packs of 3-6 have been stated.
They are said to reside in small rooms (known as coomer nests),floors littered with custom-made waifu pillows and coom from the coomer itself.
When confronted, a coomer may become enraged, attacking the offender and in rare cases even stuffing the victim into a homemade coom jar. Coomer attacks are almost always fatal and although they do not happen often due to the rarity of encountering one, only two have lived to tell the tale.
The hide of a coomer goes for 500,000 USD, while a gallon of coomer coom goes for 1,000,000 USD on the black market. The coom of a coomer is said to have rejuvenating properties when mixed with cow urine and emo juice in traditional Chinese medicines.
They are said to reside in small rooms (known as coomer nests),floors littered with custom-made waifu pillows and coom from the coomer itself.
When confronted, a coomer may become enraged, attacking the offender and in rare cases even stuffing the victim into a homemade coom jar. Coomer attacks are almost always fatal and although they do not happen often due to the rarity of encountering one, only two have lived to tell the tale.
The hide of a coomer goes for 500,000 USD, while a gallon of coomer coom goes for 1,000,000 USD on the black market. The coom of a coomer is said to have rejuvenating properties when mixed with cow urine and emo juice in traditional Chinese medicines.
My best friend went missing when hiking in a remote area of Alaska in 1993, and his body was recovered from a field a year later. The case has never been solved, but research suggests that the cause of death was likely an attack by wild coomers.
by Emomemeo June 17, 2020
Get the Coomer mug.A Mississippi Coomer is when a married woman has sex with a Coomer who jacked off beforehand and he saves the cum and they use it for lube.
“Why would you cheat on Todd with your cousin Sandy?”
“Because he gives me one hell of a Mississippi Coomer.”
“Because he gives me one hell of a Mississippi Coomer.”
by Michael Brunswick November 30, 2019
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Being cropers to those little boys over there.
by The Original Cropers October 23, 2011
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Get the Coomer-standoff mug.A piece of media, idea, or concept that relies strictly upon sexual themes to make up for its absence of humor.
In other words: Sex is the punchline.
In other words: Sex is the punchline.
Boy 1: So you actually pay attention to the comedy when you watch porn?
Boy 2: Hell yeah! I’m the biggest fan of Coomer Humor.
Boy 2: Hell yeah! I’m the biggest fan of Coomer Humor.
by 3Melanies September 8, 2022
Get the Coomer Humor mug.Phenomenon where a person has to be subject to Ignominy to make someone else look bad for knowing about NSFW content by name.
In my group chat the other day, my friend tried to make fun of me for knowing a porn actor's name in front of everyone but fell for the Coomer's Riposte.
"How do you know who Mia Khalifa is?"
"Wait, how do YOU know who that is?"
"How do you know who Mia Khalifa is?"
"Wait, how do YOU know who that is?"
by Hellen Keller Official December 30, 2022
Get the Coomer's Riposte mug.coomer humor is not very very good sources of comedy, the ones who like this humor are losers and college men who should get a job and a life.
People who post this shit should be put in therapy or be killed in countries like Afghanistan or Mexico.
People who post this shit should be put in therapy or be killed in countries like Afghanistan or Mexico.
Coomer Humor Poster: *wastes all of his Chad energy on putting less effort on a rule 34 video
Chad’s Comment: I think that this video is stupid and unfunny
A Geek’s comment: “I THINK THAT YOU SHOULD LIKE RULE 34 AND PORN BECAUSE YOULL LOVE IT”
Chad’s Comment: I think that this video is stupid and unfunny
A Geek’s comment: “I THINK THAT YOU SHOULD LIKE RULE 34 AND PORN BECAUSE YOULL LOVE IT”
by TriggeringNerdsSince1799 June 10, 2022
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