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I breathed

a response to unnecessarily harsh slander towards you
jake: "i love this shirt."
bella: "ok we get it you love that shirt."
jake: "ok wow i breathed."
by esketitauditions May 25, 2018
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Beached Turd

When someone defecates in a toilet which has very little water. The poo lands on the edge of the toilet basin and is not completely submerged, creating a deadly stank which diffuses beyond the bathroom throughout the whole house.
Man, can you smell that? I think it's coming from the bathroom downstairs... Tina must have left a beached turd in my toilet.
by Catatafish22 July 13, 2011
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Awkward Beached Whale

N. The ultimate in the range of awkward items or animals. An individual intending to correctly execute an awkward beached whale should lie face down on the ground and thrash their legs whilst pressed together as an impersonation of a whale's flipper. Then while doing this, the individual should rock from side to side whilst helplessly hitting the ground directly to their side with limp arms. The awkward beached whale is most successfully executed by lying on a floor, but it can also be executed on a table or chair.

Awkward beached whale should be used to best affect at a time of severe awkwardness which should be enough to break the ice of any situation.

*WARNING* AWKWARD BEACHED WHALE SHOULD NOT BE ATTAMPTED AT ANY INAPPROPRIATE AWKWARD TIMES SUCH AS IN A CHURCH OR IN A PROM DRESS OR TUXEDO. IT WILL CONSIDERABLY MAKE THE SITUATION MORE AWKWARD AND CAUSE PEOPLE TO TAKE OFFENCE !!!
1) Perfect time to do awkward beached whale.
(In a room where the atmosphere is unbearably awkward)

Person 1: "wow this is so awkward"
(does an awkward beached whale as directed above)
Person 2: wow who is that crazy man ?
Person 3: "It's an awkward beached whale !"
Person 2: "haha that's hilarious"

Multiple people laugh and awkwardness stops.

2) Wrong time for an awkward beached whale.
(At a formal occassion where the atmosphere is unbearably awkward)

Person 1: "wow this is so awkward"
(does an awkward beached whale as directed above)
Person 2: (silence)
Person 3: (silence)
Person 2: (silence)

Awkwardness increases and people ignore the individual who feels even more awkward for increasing the awkwardness and for messing up his/her formal clothes.
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Water Breacher

When you take a shit that comes out of the water, making the smell breach from its water shield.
Wait a couple of minutes, I just had a water breacher, it'll stink for a while.
by kevro February 11, 2015
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Miami Beached

When someone who is usually terrible with the ladies gets drunk and inexplicably starts pulling hot girls, they are Miami Beached.
"Is that girl still here?"

"Yeah."

"How the fuck did you pull her?"

"Don't know."

"You in shock or something?"

"Most likely."

"Shit, you were well Miami Beached."

"Indubitably."
by H.S. Willsy August 26, 2011
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beached as

Basically to be screwed. Originates from a YouTube video parodying the NZ accent. Made by a pair of Australians, the video shows a cartoon whale 'beached'. He says to a passing bird 'Oh no man, I'm beached as!'
'I'm missed the last bus home, I'm beached as'
by cabbagetreekiwi February 24, 2009
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bleached corpses

Spirits of the dead who attempted ambitious projects, but failed miserably. They are horribly lifeless ghosts who expect nothing but failure.
In a Charlie Rose interview, Sting nervously joked about the presence of bleached corpses hovering around the stage as he prepared songs for his first musical, The Last Ship.
by yes juanito yes October 25, 2014
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