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Bootstraptopia

A magical place built on the fantasies and grand delusions of Conservitards and Libertardians where equal economic opportunities abound for anyone capable of working hard enough to make their wildest dreams of unlimited wealth accumulation come true.

A place where finite resources and labor market thresholds are just liberal conspiracies that interfere with success.
Typical Liberal: "Damn, it's really hard trying to make ends meet now that I've been fired for being drunk on the job, maybe I should go on unemployment, food stamps, or government assistance forever."

Conservitard/Libertardian: "Well maybe you should get off your drunk ass and come on down to Bootstraptopia and get yourself a STEM field career you lazy entitled piece of shit!"
by Dildo Tractor October 10, 2013
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Alabama Bootstraps

The long, dangly, meaty labia of a female relative.
I snuck into my cousin’s room and hiked up her night gown and gave a good tugging to her Alabama bootstraps before I cornholed her.
by Dick Onchin November 3, 2020
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bootytalk

African American Porn Movies for your pleasure with black girls with Big Booty's
Damn Did U see BootyTalk 29 like i seen Beyonce on there.
by Slapsta July 1, 2005
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bootywanger

A bootywanger is a gay male who likes wander in his booty
O he is a bootywanger.
by Bootywanger December 27, 2016
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bootysnap

Something that grows in you're ass when you are playing Brutal Doom. It's growth process takes 3 hours and it's very slow, but if it's fully grown, SGTMarkIV will drain it from you and you'll die, then he converts bootysnap into scrump and he channels it to crashhelper's dad. If enough scrump is channeled, Crashhelper's dad will tell the toys to attack the galaxy and turn us into rape slaves. Fucking clones won't stop playing brutal doom!
Clone: OMG BRUTAL DOOM ROCKS!
SOMEMONG: Brutal doom sucks, and check in you're ass!
Clone: WTF IZ DAT WITE STUFF?
SOMEMONG: Bootysnap, it's growing already you fucking clone!
by Dr. Mr. Pingas December 5, 2016
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Cincinnati Bootstrap

The small area of skin between the vagina or penis/ball sack and the anus that is particularly dirty and smelly because of a failed back to front wipe job. In other words, a taint with some shit on it.

Also known as taint, grundle or gooch.
I was railing my neighbor’s wife from behind when I began getting some wafts of dirty ass. I looked down to her Cincinnati bootstrap needed a bit of a wash.

I wiped my ass the wrong way cause I was in a hurry and gave myself a Cincinnati boot strap.

The homeless dude was washing his Cincinnati bootstrap in the Park fountain.
by Dick Onchin October 12, 2020
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texas bootstrap

When a rugged older man rubs his rough taint on a younger lady's face/mouth
Sure I'm getting up there in age, but that doesn't stop me from going to a bar by the college and finding a nice young broad to give a texas bootstrap to.
by serequiem May 2, 2007
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