alterbate

1.a retarded spelling of alternate in html with hillarious results
2.what normal(well normal enough)people do when their hiding in the back of their closets with HTML manuals.

1. Wow ur retard. Its not alterbate, its alternate. Shit your stupid.
2. Dont try to hide the unnavoidable fact that you like to alterbate in the closet to HTML manuals every tuesday night.

by Shannon&Courtney July 13, 2007

Ambien Assturbated

After taking four or more Ambiens and forcing yourself to stay awake, you become convinced that adding a thumb or finger in your ass will improve the masterbation in which you are already involved. This applies both to the male and female. Further, the digit in your ass need not be your own.

Hey Dad. Yes son. Last night I got so fucked up on Ambien I stuck a finger in my ass while masterbating. Is that normal? Son, you Ambien Assturbated. It's all good.

Dude, last night Jen and I got fucked up on Ambien, stayed awake, and while were making out she stuck a finger in my ass...and I didn't stop her. Dude, you were Ambien Assturbated.

by tst2000 October 6, 2010

alterbate

using the opposite hand to which you would regularly masturbate with

i felt like something different today, so i used my left hand to alterbate

by santizi August 7, 2009

Asturbate

To masturbate in your head without ever touching yourself.

Friend-do you masturbate?
You-Nah man, I asturbate because it's a sin to touch yourself.
Friend- Wow, you're a loser

by Mt_2013 April 10, 2015

Assturbate

To use a butt to masturbate one's penis.

I never care about the face or the body. I just grab the hips and use that ass to assturbate my cock.

by Fkrtist September 4, 2013

assterbate

anal masterbation

That skank ho was assterbating with her butt plug

by fizgig April 7, 2003

airsterbate

The act of mimicing masterbastion with your hand in front of your body. Usually when someone is bragging, lying, or going on and on about something.

When Gino AGAIN started telling women about his 'fishing 'experiences, all we started to airsterbate.

by mrkymrk July 18, 2009