Assassination Attempt

When you dont trust a suspicious fart, and are able to make it to a bathroom and not shit your pants.

Friend: Where's Joey?
Other Friend: He's recovering from an Assassination Attempt.

by Techpony September 3, 2012

attempted martyr

The 'crime' of surviving one's religion motivated suicide.

Upon hearing of Mohammad surviving his suicide attack, my imam declared, "It's just another case of attempted martyr."

by mouselb September 7, 2014

attempted thought

The attempt to provide assistance or concern, without really meaning it or having the intention to follow through. By saying the acceptable or possibly "expected" comment, it removes the temporary guilt, that the speaker feels.

Well, I suppose it's the "attempted thought" that counts! (sarcasm)

by Tiffany Happy Days June 18, 2014

A Daan Attempt

A Daan attempt is not knowing what your doing but brining it with a cocky level of confidence so stupid people believe that you're pulling it off.

“Yikes man that was a Daan Attempt at playing the guitar”

by notnathamj November 16, 2017

attempted-murderfuck

When you attempt and fail at the act of murderfucking. Also, a vengeful hatefuck, possibly placing the victim in a near death type of situation.

Ronald - Lorrie cheated on me, so I tried to fuck her to death. But in the end all I could manage to give her was the attempted-murderfuck.
Bruce - I bet you feel like a failure.

Ronald - Absolutely Bruce.

by murderfucker October 26, 2009

attempt it and succeed

The new, corrected, optimistic, and success inducing version of the idiom "trial and error."

Some of the few individuals who stop to analyze language and think about what humans are really doing, really not doing, and perhaps should be doing, realized that the idiom trial and error induces failure, and they have corrected it to "attempt it and succeed."

by but for December 24, 2017

attempted murder

When your girlfriend breaks up with you so she can fuck other guys, but fails miserably and gets back with you. same concept as having a shitty life, attempting murder, then living in prison.

"Bro, I told you she is just gonna attempted murder you"
"But her eyes are so pretty"
"SHE'S FAT NOW BRO, MOVE ON."

by Joint Roller 04’ July 10, 2018