The Cincinnati Open

On their back and blacked out.

We were doing the Cincinnati Open when suddenly they came too and kicked me in the nards.

by DrDingleGinger August 14, 2025

Canadian Bottle Opener

Just before you plan having anal sex with your partner, you reach out the window wearing a hockey glove (to protect your hand from the cold) you grab your bottle of Maple Syrup. (all good Canadians keep at least 3 bottles of their favorite Maple Syrup in the snow fridge outside their window) Sticking the top of the bottle of Maple Syrup in their partners Tim Hortons Chocolate Donut Hole, you proceed to empty the entire bottle. At the very last drop you pop the bottle out and in a downward motion making the “O” ring pop the top sound as any great Canadian Lager would do upon opening.

I bet Nancy over last night and gave her a proper Canadian Bottle Opener. It was so loud it almost caused an avalanche out back.

by Artie J Saves December 23, 2025

hop on the open

What you say to your music-making friends who you want to feature your song as the 2nd verse

cntct: yo, can you hop on the open i sent you like 3 months ago? i even mixed the song and everything
zade: nah

by rogerwilsonidontknowhim January 7, 2026

useless as a call-centre operative

Usually someone utterly, totally useless, but can be applied to inanimate objects. Lacking any empowerment, thus going so far as to be inactively obstructive.
Etymology: in the UK a number of large companies operate call-centres. When one attempts to call these to complain, the usual response from the responder (the call-centre operative) is feigned interest in the issue, involving lengthy explanations, then the final response is that they cannot authorise the issue in question as due to lack of authority. The issues can be of any magnitude. When asked to be passed to a manager, they claim the manager is unavailable and will call back (this is the inactive-obstructive part). This never occurs, so one calls again. The situation recurses.
c.f. "chocolate teapot"

I attempted to wipe my arse with some own-brand toilet paper, after wiping the paper looked clean but the disgusting skiddies in my kecks later showed it was as useless as a call-centre operative.

by monsieur_tm December 30, 2013

Pan the river but I ain't opening a mine

When you are talking about a shallow dip of interest in a particular subject or preference for dating.

Jon: "Why you be skipping all them fine white chicks?"
Kevin: "Some of them are fine but you're tripping if you think they all are."
Jon: "What, that why you always sticking with colored women?"
Kevin: "I may like the occasional white chick; I may pan the river but I ain't opening a mine."

by Artemis Rockers May 2, 2020

a hearty chuckle leaves an open throat

something literally EVERYBODY has said

You: Why can't I laugh?
Me: You know what they say... a hearty chuckle leaves an open throat

by everyonesaidthat December 22, 2021

A computer can't function without an operating system

A total lie usually mentioned in computer textbooks when talking about operating systems. Older computers sometimes do not have an operating system, so this is totally a lie because these computers can still function. Also, even modern computers can make use of the Basic Input Output System (BIOS) to do some basic tasks such as viewing and changing the date.

School textbooks: "A computer can't function without an operating system!"
1930s computer operator: "wtf is that"

by 48GI5N32D3D November 26, 2023