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go fuck jesus

something you say to smebody when they are complaining about you "not following rules" or "being rude" or if they are just being an annoying goody goody asshole. Can also be used on Jesus Freaks.
Person #1- Hey! you shouldn't do that!

Person #2- Go fuck jesus.
by LolointheSkywithDiamonds August 24, 2008
mugGet the go fuck jesusmug.

Jesus Tapdancing Christ

An exclamation showing extreme surprise, anger, frusteration, or pain. Because it is mildly blasphemous, it should be used only under the most extreme of negative situations.
I think my left not just got run over by a car...JESUS TAPDANCING CHRIST!
by Crazy Dick July 4, 2003
mugGet the Jesus Tapdancing Christmug.

Jesus loves me

1. A phrase used mostly by Christians, but also by anyone else when they realize everyone hates them as a desperate attempt to instill some feeling of self-worth. This works wonders on low self-esteem, by reminding yourself that even though everyone else wants to strangle you, your imaginary friend Jesus will love you no matter what.

2. The title of a song, created for the same purpose but has a catchy tune.
1. Dude: Everyone hates you.
Loser: Well...Jesus still loves me!

2. Through out the neighborhood, the words rang strong and clear: "Jesus loooves me this I knoooow, for the Bible tells me soooo. Little ones to him belong, they are weak but he is strong! Yessss Jesus loves meeeee, Yessss Jesus loves meeee...."
And everyone knew, that Sam had been dumped yet again.
by What's it to you? July 22, 2006
mugGet the Jesus loves memug.

Jersey Jesus Walker

A woman wearing a floor-length maxi dress (most likely with spaghetti straps) made of jersey, resembling Jesus in his robes.

JJWs usually wear gladiator sandals and have a blatant disregard for the rule of summer that demands bare legs.
"Gross...there's another Jersey Jesus Walker hiding her cankles."
by flosie August 3, 2009
mugGet the Jersey Jesus Walkermug.

jesus H. christ

The H stands for Jesus' favorite fruit, honeydew melon.
"Jesus H. Christ! Will you please shut up already?!"
by LotsaPasta March 25, 2017
mugGet the jesus H. christmug.

kung-fu for jesus

Some people in Alabama who are crazy and learn karate for Jesus. They are Pentecostal Crazies and speak in tongues. It's like Karate For Christ or something. It's freaky in a bad bad way.
onlooker#1: Dude, they just beat the shit out of that Hindu.
onlooker#2: Yeah, it's those crazy guys that do kung-fu for Jesus.
by mofojimbo August 2, 2009
mugGet the kung-fu for jesusmug.

Jesus Cluny Frog

A more PG version of Jesus Christ.
Used when angry or suprised, but not so angry/surprised that you forget that an authority figure (i.e. The Man) is in hearing range.
Common in the Diana Tregarde Series by Mercedes Lackey, which is about urban witch Diana's occult investigation service.
*Figure darts out into road*
Diana: Jesus Cluny Frog! *Hits the brakes* What was THAT?!
Bum: *Knocks on window* Spare change, ma'am?
Di: Oh... sure, I--
Bum: *Gets eaten by large demon*
Di: AAAAaaaahhhh!!!
by WelcomeToNowhere April 29, 2010
mugGet the Jesus Cluny Frogmug.

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