last place at a turd eating contest

Beyond mere failure, the absolute pinnacle of loserdom.

Amy didn't just fail, it was more like she got last place at a turd eating contest.

by Goat Milking Contest Winner. December 12, 2012

turd burgler

(noun) One that participates in the act of turd burgling
(verb) the act of defecation/turd penetration into a partners anus repeatedly back and forth.

The turd burgler and I were turd burgling, but our anal seal just wasn't tight enough, so I spurgled snurgle down my leg.

by TBurgler44 August 31, 2013

Turd Burglar

Someone who steals your shit to make themselves look better to others.

Jim: "Jesus Dan. Did John just take your iPhone to show to his girlfriend?"

Dan: "Yea. He's a turd burglar."

by A Time Walker September 3, 2013

Turd

A term of ENDEARMENT often used by cute girls to get the attention of the most awesome people they know, often is a bad ass mofo. Turds are often imitated but never duplicated. sexy amazing ill the ish

"Damn Turd just found the cure to cancer, ended world hunger, and brought peace to the whole world!!!"

by Mrs. Lerman August 25, 2013

Newton's Turd

The Psychological version of his 3rd Law ("for every action… ) of Motion.

Alluded to in Matthew 7:1, "Judge not… "

Unlike Physics, tends to build into a frenzy, akin to one upping & pissing contest, not settle down.
The 'turd' reference is from apeshit, from a the practice of an enraged ape, takes or finds his recent dump and hurling it

Counselors & Priests see plenty of Newton's Turd in action when dealing with marital & relationship problems

by AmboNec September 21, 2013

turd swiggler

Someone who puts crap in their mouth and squishes it around before either swallowing or spiting it out. Usually done in the act as part of a fecal fettish

Sally and I really had a good time last night Afte she blew me, she gave me a rim job and squirled it around.. Shes a hell of a turd swiggler

by masarasa6000 November 14, 2011

Turd Hog

A person who shits their pants alot and/or takes it in the butt.

Person 1: (farts during the whole class and it's rank)
Person 2: "Man your a turd hog, go wipe your ass"

by Trudaddy November 5, 2011