Ian

Do you know a Kyle anywhere, here's Ian for you, a man of brutal honesty, shotgunning all over TVs and lots of frogs. omelets for breakfast, raw chicken for lunch and whole lotta complaints along the way. But what a man, what a legend, this guy is the type of guy to make you laugh and be pissed off at the same time. Wanna get to experience how hell is like, try being Ian for a day. Gym hardo and hard-ons. Probably see him making out with a few dumbbells as he slowly progresses through the sets. An advocate for memes. Laughs with his mouth open so you'll get a refreshing taste of morning breath. Loves to make racist jokes, does not hold back, but lowkey feels bad. You'll find him in the bog catching frogs and throwing it somewhere. Don't be surprised if one day you'll find underground frog fighting tournaments. Loving kid but say something wrong and you'll probably feel like shit after. Also, protect all nearby walls. Have home depot on speed dial if you see him around. Overall 10/10

Bystander: What happened to my room???
Victim:...Ian
Bystander: ah, give home Depot a call.

by graham_cracker_bust_nut October 30, 2019

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