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Cardiovascular Assistant I

Otherwise known as a TA, a comical and tardy individual who’s consistently only productive on Thursdays.
This damn CardioVascular Assistant I (TA)never gets any linen.
by Pavss June 8, 2018
mugGet the Cardiovascular Assistant Imug.

Eli Assist

An assist where the pass had little to no affect on if a point was scored, yet still receives an assist.
Teammate scored & still got an assist even though you last touched the ball 10 seconds ago? Call it an Eli Assist.
by Razosaku May 20, 2022
mugGet the Eli Assistmug.

Assistant Simp

When you wingman a Simp yet you are not a simp yourself.
"Today I helped Elliot get this girl he was after."

"You mean that simp? So you're basically his Assistant Simp?"
by Sh0rtkakke March 25, 2020
mugGet the Assistant Simpmug.

Murphy's Law of Customer-Assistance

"You can stroll a store's aisles till Doomsday and never spot da item you want, but then, just as soon as you interrupt a staffperson to ask for help in locating said desirable, THAT'S when you will notice your sought-after item right off!"
While stocking up on food at a Super Walmart, I was looking for larger packages of Armour Vienna sausage so that I could save a few cents per can, but although I had thoroughly searched the surrounding areas on the shelves, I still hadn't found anything bigger than the small six-packs, so I finally asked a nearby employee if there were any of the larger packages in stock, possibly in the back room. Well, just as we were both walking back to the area of the aisle where I'd been looking, THAT'S when I finally spied the 12-packs that were sitting on the very top shelf! Guess that was a classic case of Murphy's Law of Customer-Assistance... ah, well, again, the 12-packs were indeed sitting very high up, so at least that was a plausible excuse for my not having seen them before, especially since the store usually doesn't even expect its customers to notice stuff that's placed 'way up there, anyway; that "lofty" location is merely where they store extra merchandise for replenishing the lower-down shelves when the stock there starts to run low.
by QuacksO May 14, 2019
mugGet the Murphy's Law of Customer-Assistancemug.

Relationship Assistant

Someone you employ to help fill in the gaps that your main relationship is no longer meeting.

May be on a permanent or temporary basis, paid or unpaid.

Services can include companionship, advice or sexual favors.
Leon: "Dating Stacey is so hard. She's always away on business."
Fred: "Why don't you talk to Kylie? She's a professional relationship assistant."
by just like honey November 21, 2021
mugGet the Relationship Assistantmug.

aim assist

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aim assist is tene daddy skrt boiswdwd
by LOLITSALEEX September 24, 2017
mugGet the aim assistmug.

Crew chief assistant

A bunch of dumbdumbs, with dumbdumb ideologies, dumbdumb meanings, and dumbdumb personalities. If the plane craches, its their fault
Oh! A crew chief assistant? Must be a dumbass
by ngjerseth November 4, 2020
mugGet the Crew chief assistantmug.

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