Virgil: I ate too much chickpea noodle spaghetti and paid the price.
Cletus: How so ?
Virgil: I took a shit and it curled around in the toilet bowl. It looked like a bologna ring.
Cletus: Ew.
Virgil : It just spun round and round in there leaving skid marks but never went to it's home so I left it.
Cletus : What about the next man up ?
Virgil: While I was getting my gas station hot dog, Takis and fountain drink I heard the cashier call for cleanup near aisle 7. I think the toilet overflowed and it slithered it's way out onto the floor. I saw the junior gas station attendant heading towards the area with a mop and a snow shovel for scraping that bad boy off the floor. All in a days work I guess.
Cletus: How so ?
Virgil: I took a shit and it curled around in the toilet bowl. It looked like a bologna ring.
Cletus: Ew.
Virgil : It just spun round and round in there leaving skid marks but never went to it's home so I left it.
Cletus : What about the next man up ?
Virgil: While I was getting my gas station hot dog, Takis and fountain drink I heard the cashier call for cleanup near aisle 7. I think the toilet overflowed and it slithered it's way out onto the floor. I saw the junior gas station attendant heading towards the area with a mop and a snow shovel for scraping that bad boy off the floor. All in a days work I guess.
by cut the cards March 12, 2026
Get the Bologna ring mug.Rien: Screw the Index, fuck you clankers
Albina: The Ring is better, bitch*puts him inside the iron maiden again*
Albina: The Ring is better, bitch*puts him inside the iron maiden again*
by Albina, The Ring Apprentice March 19, 2026
Get the The Ring mug.Related Words
Ring0
• ring of fire
• Ringo
• ringer
• Ringo Starr
• ring
• Ringpiece
• ring toss
• ringknocker
• ring the bell
by explodingbannana July 26, 2025
Get the Saturns ring mug.The theory that conservative men dislike women with septum piercings, due to a person, generally, needing to be over the age of 18 in order to get one.
by Omega_Iteration August 8, 2025
Get the Septum Ring Theory mug.The nose ring theory suggests that a woman wearing a nose ring is often perceived as displaying higher levels of emotional instability, confrontational behavior, and unresolved personal trauma, which some believe she has internalized in a way that significantly influences her personality.
Simple definition:
The Nose Ring Theory is the humorous idea that women with nose rings are more likely to be emotionally intense, dramatic, or have unresolved issues.
Simple definition:
The Nose Ring Theory is the humorous idea that women with nose rings are more likely to be emotionally intense, dramatic, or have unresolved issues.
The nose ring theory: one piercing away from a personality built on vibes, chaos, and unhealed trauma.
by johndoedefinesshit August 25, 2025
Get the nose ring theory mug.The theory that a woman with a nose ring (particularly a septum piercing) creates and often has a personally defined by personal trauma, a need to prove she's "authentic", disagreeableness, and far leftism. Often masculine men perceive these women as something to avoid.
Man 1: Hey bro, that girl over there is pretty cute. Should I show her the rizz?
Man 2: Keep walking bud! Have you heard of nose ring theory? She looks like the prize bull at the county fair.
Man 2: Keep walking bud! Have you heard of nose ring theory? She looks like the prize bull at the county fair.
by Obeflow August 27, 2025
Get the Nose Ring Theory mug.Septum Ring Theory is a vague insult typically used against people with septum rings on social media platforms like TikTok. There's no concrete definition, but you know it when you see it. Septum Ring Theory is characterized by the following qualities.
• Septum Piercing (Obviously, and other present piercings in a given example strengthens the theory & insult's effect)
• Dyed Hair (Typically bright, attention hungry colors)
• Heavily left-leaning/liberal ideology
• Misandry
• Inflated sense of self importance/ego
• Inability to take accountability
• Tattoos (Not a requirement, but often found alongside the other indicators)
The purpose of the insult is to make the target angry. Responses to being told they fit the definition of septum piercing theory typically revolve around virginity or baselessly insinuating that the person receiving the insult is attractive to the person delivering it (this is the aforementioned inflated sense of self importance/ego showing itself in full.) These people will also lump you into a nebulous group of conservative boogeymen, which is where the political angle comes in despite the comment itself having nothing to do with politics. These replies are exactly what is expected though, and only help to further prove the Septum Ring Theory.
In short, Septum Piercing Theory is a comment that's designed to knock a very specific set of chronically online losers down a peg, and it usually works to great effect, almost like a cheat code.
• Septum Piercing (Obviously, and other present piercings in a given example strengthens the theory & insult's effect)
• Dyed Hair (Typically bright, attention hungry colors)
• Heavily left-leaning/liberal ideology
• Misandry
• Inflated sense of self importance/ego
• Inability to take accountability
• Tattoos (Not a requirement, but often found alongside the other indicators)
The purpose of the insult is to make the target angry. Responses to being told they fit the definition of septum piercing theory typically revolve around virginity or baselessly insinuating that the person receiving the insult is attractive to the person delivering it (this is the aforementioned inflated sense of self importance/ego showing itself in full.) These people will also lump you into a nebulous group of conservative boogeymen, which is where the political angle comes in despite the comment itself having nothing to do with politics. These replies are exactly what is expected though, and only help to further prove the Septum Ring Theory.
In short, Septum Piercing Theory is a comment that's designed to knock a very specific set of chronically online losers down a peg, and it usually works to great effect, almost like a cheat code.
Person A (with septum piercing): Men don't deserve rights/are trash/should be killed, etc, etc.
Person B (Usually a faceless account in Person A's comment section): Septum Ring Theory still undefeated.
Person A (in a video response to the comment): Spoken from a man who's never had his face in between a woman's legs. (They think they ate with this 🤭)
Person B (Usually a faceless account in Person A's comment section): Septum Ring Theory still undefeated.
Person A (in a video response to the comment): Spoken from a man who's never had his face in between a woman's legs. (They think they ate with this 🤭)
by The Masterful Baiter September 15, 2025
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