Wank royale

When one masturbates with a condom on

Guy 1: I could never cheat on my girlfriend, I think I love her.
Guy2: If the buildup get's too much for you, you can borrow one of my condoms, have a wank royale.
Guy 2: Oh thanks dude

by The Stone Age March 2, 2021

Full Kit Wank

A derivation of a full kit wanker, as well as being fully kitted up in the team colours of your choice (with no intention of playing a game). You are also masturbation.

Man I was dressed up ready to go and had a Full Kit Wank

by Dingo3000 May 18, 2022

wank couch

A couch you should never ever sit on. Smells a bit musty and tacky to the touch.

This is the wank couch, I'd sit somewhere else if I were you.

by Camo Clown February 16, 2017

Greebly-Wank

When die-hard fans of a film or franchise create elaborate backstories for things that ultimately had no real purpose, such as greeblys used in production design elements

Look at that absolute nerd, he created a whole Greebly-wank Wiki page on Darth Maul's earring

by Toodarnloud February 8, 2024

mojo wank

having a wank pre-booty call to up your stamina for the main round.

mate 1: what are you doing?

mate 2: having a mojo wank before fanny comes over

by diddly dingbat October 21, 2015

whizz wank

Where you wank at an extremely fast speed

'im just off for a whizz wank, im done :D'

by ninjaabill December 21, 2009

a nigel danger wank

Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.

a nigel danger wank job

by mrs tosser October 6, 2025