Wal*Mart Worker

Found primarily in the Northern Middle West section of the United States, a highly skilled, extremely reliable species formerly known as a "lathe operator" or "foundry worker". Typically known to have paid taxes, served in the armed forces, engaged in longstanding monogmous relationships with a female of the same species. Usually producing a "family" of four children that "lathe operator" proudly sent off to college that he mostly paid for. Formerly earned $30/hr. at Ford Motor Company. Metamorphosis into "Wal-Mart Worker" seems to occur upon the onset of middle-age when "lathe operator" and "foundy workers" travel to Mexico for several weeks and engage in apparent transfer of skills and expertise to native Mexican species. Metamorphosized "Wal-Mart worker" emerges from habitat after several months after he returns from Mexico during a period of dormancy called "unemployment". Species is usually found in a red vest showing teeth at other North American species and saying, "Welcome to Wal-Mart". Species appears to be less vigorous in metamorphosized state.

Dad's doing OK, even though he's pretty depressed now that he can't do his trade the way he used to; he's become a Wal*Mart worker.

by Thinking Republican February 25, 2008

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Wal-Mart God

A deity lower income individuals pray to when wanting to bring good fortune into their lives.

The neighborhood Wal-Mart is the sanctuary. The congregation is the local inbred.

Oh Wal-Mart God,

Please bring your smiley face to the electronics section to lower the price on the 32 inch plasma television. And yea, allow me to buy the Remington 870 with the ammo today. Dear Lord, I had to take a rain check on the Dale Jr. beach towel. Please speed the trucks to my location so I can have that before the Watkins Glen race. Cigarettes are not on sale for name brand and I pray that you see it in your heart to forgive Phillip-Morris for raising prices. I ask that you help me find my Tweedy Bird slipper I lost chasing Rickey Dale Jr. through the parking lot where I left his dirty diaper for someone else to clean up. Finally I would like to thank you for allowing me to spank my kids in the toy section with no penalty from the local authorities.

In Sam’s name we pray,

Amen

by Stinky MacBurr June 23, 2009

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Wal-Mart

A large, parasitic corporation who moves like a plague, eating up all business in it's wake, and leaving a large, gray store with cheap, plastic crap.

They take jobs, and then screw over their employees by destroying any union they come up with, or fireing them, or making them work in the childrens section.

They close down all little shoppes in the area, and then sponsor people to start up new businesses, with advance revinue going back to Wal-Mart (*This is just a conspiracy theory, but I'm sure it is real*)

Damn Wal-Mart moved in. The Pic-n-Save is gone, and now I have to work there. If I say anything about Union, they'll fire me. Damn Wal-Mart.

Look at those hippies, trying to stop Wal-Mart from being built. Spike those trees!

Wal-Mart stores are niggers! (check my definition)

by Maine Event April 8, 2004

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Wal-Mart fall apart

Though this phrase originally referred to products from Wal-Mart being of poor quality, it may now also refer to the communities essentially destroyed by Wal-Mart - it throws its weight around and puts everyone else in the area out of business, essentially destroying the local economy while ensuring that what's left of it depends solely on Wal-Mart for survival.

Both types of Wal-Mart Fall Apart are reasons not to shop there.

by progamer124 May 13, 2005

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