Porch Monkey

A porch monkey is a black unintelligent lazy person

Shut the fuck up porch monkey

by mind yo ownnn April 18, 2023

Porch kids

In a blended family, these are children of no blood relation fro. A former marriage...a porch kid is a step beyond a step child

I took my porch kids to the concert.

by poppy3415 July 2, 2019

Porch Ham

(n.) A large melon that is consumed during gatherings in summer months generally in a communal manner on a porch or stoop; Watermelon

Hey Jamal, we gotta head to auntie's because she's cuttin up some of that porch ham for us to munch on!

by Flannel_Patriot May 26, 2022

Porch nipples

Sweaty, hillbilly areolae, glistening in the sun on Meemaw’s front porch.

Boy, get on in here and put a shirt on, lest you put your porch nipples on display for the whole world to see.

by Dotenheimer June 13, 2023

porch slacker

Someone who is readily suitable for any endeavor, but is too self aware to ever leave his house. A mental block that most commonly affects teen-aged through middle-aged men (and some women) who face anxiety when leaving their house. See also: herb.

Susan: Alonso was so totally stoked for this party, but I don't see him anywhere..
Jake: Yea but he's such a porch slacker, he's probably masturbating to those spring fling pictures I posted on his facebook page.

by EEPERSCREEPERS May 21, 2010

Porch-cane

Enjoying a frosty Hurricane malt beverage on the front porch of a dilapidated house or building while sitting preferably on a couch and watching traffic drive by.

"Dude," he said with a grin, "The weather is pretty sweet today, lets have a porch-cane."

by Slippery Nickel April 26, 2008

Porch Monkey

A person who sits on their porch all day, usually doing drugs or pissing off of it. They also will show off their genitals and on occasion actually go inside.

Did you see that porch monkey? He just flipped me off while whipping a dog with his dick.

by TerminalJam December 4, 2019