When your name is Sean and you go to Dunstable Downs and get wanked off under a tree and cant finish
by S Penny August 17, 2022
Post-wank vision helps improve your judgement on relationship decisions when your horny. When you take off the ‘wank goggles’ your mind will be clearer, allowing you to assess relationship decisions based on there true attributes (and not just her fine ass).
Eoghan: *thinks to himself* awwwwww fuck that took way too long. Thank god for twins.
Eoghan text: mate, my post wank vision suggests I should keen this chick around.
Andrew M: nice move mate, all big calls should be made with a clear mind.
What time will I meet you for the McGregor fight?
Eoghan text: mate, my post wank vision suggests I should keen this chick around.
Andrew M: nice move mate, all big calls should be made with a clear mind.
What time will I meet you for the McGregor fight?
by Some mate1 January 26, 2020
by ThatPurple July 30, 2017
Person 1: 'The battery went on my phone while I was trying to find some porn!'
Person 2: 'Gutted for you'
Person 1: 'It's okay I just had a 1984 wank instead. Takes a bit longer but gets the job done.'
Person 2: 'Gutted for you'
Person 1: 'It's okay I just had a 1984 wank instead. Takes a bit longer but gets the job done.'
by Phillyfella July 22, 2021
by the david robson July 01, 2011
Something and/or someone that can be used to enhance a person's masturbating experience. Common wank materials include vibrators and pornography.
The manager of the company led the two individuals, Joanna and Fredrick, to an interesting grey-walled room, filled with some sort of assorted materials, all different colours stacked neatly on different shelves. A television screen placed right at the back centre of it all, playing what seemed to be animated Not-Safe-For-Work (NSFW) content (see "hentai").
"What.. is all this stuff?" Joanna asked, gazing at the colour-assorted items in the room.
The manager put his fists on his hips, looked at the material and proudly exclaims, "These.. are just some examples of our range of wank material! We've got vibrators, lube, copies of famous pornography, you name it! Use it for any sexual desire you both may have~" He lowers his hands and looks at both Joanna and Fredrick with a smirk. "That is, if you both are in a relationship ready to take things further." The manager winks, leaving the two in a state of confusion and embarrassment.
"What.. is all this stuff?" Joanna asked, gazing at the colour-assorted items in the room.
The manager put his fists on his hips, looked at the material and proudly exclaims, "These.. are just some examples of our range of wank material! We've got vibrators, lube, copies of famous pornography, you name it! Use it for any sexual desire you both may have~" He lowers his hands and looks at both Joanna and Fredrick with a smirk. "That is, if you both are in a relationship ready to take things further." The manager winks, leaving the two in a state of confusion and embarrassment.
by short_story_examples May 31, 2023
The nice salesman at the Toyota dealership let me test drive the car and do a Towby wank to see if the car was right for me
by Noah fox gibbons November 30, 2021