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Jonah

These are things you can recognize a Jonah by:
- They're very skinny and look unhealthy like they smoked a bunch of kush blunts instead of sleeping
- You also can call them 'Klojonahs'
- They usually don't do any kind of sports.
- They talk a lot about politics and why you should vote for D66. They will offend you, when you vote for another party.
- They have a great sense of humor, but are very close-minded to other people's jokes.
- They often do a lot of unsuccessful karate tricks without any reason
- They dance when they feel depressive
- They will often stare at a wall if they're bored
- They usually play a silly game on the computer with three other no-livers. When the holiday is the over they realize how they wasted their free time
- They don't know what they want to do in the future, because they have no further interests than brag about Pechtold and talk about how they conquered a piece of land in a game
- They don't talk a lot to girls, usually when a girl is very close to them, they look away.

- When you joke about them having a relationship with a girl, they become angry
"That unhealthy blonde looking piece of trash actually has a great sense of humor, that's Jonah"
"Jonah always disapproves my jokes, whyyyy"
"Jonah and Jetta should have a relationship, but he doesn't like the idea"
by BatroniekBochtwerper February 18, 2018
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Jonah

A guy that fakes being drunk and has a tiny dick
Guy: ur faking

Jonah: no I’m not I’m plastered
by Dick swayed November 3, 2019
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Jonah

A skinny and introverted person, who generally opens up when you meet him. Only watches the dankest and spiciest memes. Will sometimes say the gayest or most retarded shit without noticing it. Can be an asshole at times, and is not afraid to insult people when he needs to, but he will generally be a nice person. Don't get too attached tho, because he has the smallest micropenis.
Person 1: that skinny ass blonde kid ran into class screaming "Poland Can Into Space"

Person 2: thats just Jonah being himself
by polishgay December 11, 2019
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Jonra

The most erroneous way to spell the word 'genre'
Tim: OMG, Jasmine just spelt 'genre' as 'jonra'... How dumb can she be, lol
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Jonah Arguement

An arguement in which on of the arguers will not give up no matter what evidence is provided to prove otherwise.
Hey, you look like that guy from Footloose!
Uhmmm, NO, I look nothing like him.
Wait a minute, you ARE the guy from Footloose!
Nuh, uh.
Yes...
NO!
God damn, A Jonah Arguement.
by Doostien Ynskype June 29, 2008
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Pulling a Jonah

The act of ditching your friends by way of passivley using an excuse such as: I need to get some beer, I need to get some smokes, I'm just meeting someone don't worry i'll be right back...
-oh guys i'll be right back need to go get some more beer
-yeah bro no prob see you soon
(an hour later)
-dude where the fuck did he go....
-oh man he's just pulling a jonah again
by Rewcifer December 10, 2010
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Jonah Hex Stoned

when your sooo stoned your willing to see jonah hex
person 1- hey person 2, do you wanna see Jonah Hex?
person 2- how high are you?
person 1- Actually I'm Jonah Hex Stoned.
by mikeymikey45 July 7, 2010
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