John-spawn

Your mother being a prostitute

To be the son or daughter of a John

"What the hell would you know?, You're a f**king John-spawn"

by Jamesalberta December 10, 2008

Commander John

Someone who spends too much time on the toilet.

Are you still in there?...OMG...what is taking you so long, Commander John?

by KoDeCKS April 2, 2009

John Bloom

Famous English Adventurer best known for his actions as a playboy at the Bulgarian seaside during the 60's

Oh, you mean that John Bloom that arrived from the deep Black Sea in his 007 amphibia car and was central for Bowie's first record deal!

by Olive Climber October 17, 2008

The John Denver

A drink for the elite class, the John Denver is not for the light hearted or weak livered. The drink consists of a Super Troopers inspired maple syrup chug, followed immediately by a shotgunned beer.

Dude, i did three John Denvers last night. I need to go to the hospital and get checked for diabetes because of The John Denver.

by I am all that is man May 3, 2014

peaceful john

Giving a blow job to sleeping guy

Randy passed out but that girl was so hammered she gave him a peaceful john

by moosewithdabiggoose June 22, 2014

Hand-john

Getting a handjob while shitting

Laura was so drunk she agreed to a hand-john

by Mapleleafsy July 7, 2014

attention john

n., a person who gives an attention whore what he or she wants the most. This kind of person is required to keep the whole attention prostitution enterprise going.

Example:
Attention whore posts a picture of perfect semi-nude body with caption, "Nobody <3 me cuz im 2 fat. ;("
Attention john comments, "No, baby, you're beautiful in every way! I'm sure you are smart and kind and honest, too!"

by perdix_ November 2, 2014