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SPF Handy

Noun.
A handjob given using sunscreen lotion for lubrication.
Linda Rucker denied the accusation that she had offered Christopher Waterhouse an SPF handy at summer camp.
by eunuchorns and reignboughs August 11, 2014
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Red Handy

When a menstruating woman pleasures herself and her dude walks in a catches her and he’s disgusted so to try and make it better she give him a hand job with her bloody hand.
Guy 1: Why is your dick red, I can’t put that in my mouth?
Guy 2: Oh, craziest thing, I caught your sister masturbating and to keep me from running and telling everyone, she gave me a Red Handy.
Guy 1: GROSS DUDE SHE’S ON HER PERIOD!
Guy 2: Haha, exactly.
by Captain Red Wing June 6, 2018
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jam handy

1. The popular 1940's Educational Film Production Company, 'Jam Handy', who created such classic films as "A Case of Spring Fever"
2. The even more popular sexual favour, provided by certain prostitutes, whereby the hand job is enhanced by liberal application of various jams, jellies and preserves. At the lower end of the menu is the 'Hartley's Strawberry Jam Handy', which will cost on average £2.50 due to the low fruit content, all the way up to Fortnam and Mason's High Grove Organic Damson Preserve , which will cost a discerning customer at least £10 a Handy. Seville Orange Marmalade Handy's are seasonal.
Most Jam Handys are executed with seedless jam, but there are some fringe extremists that prefer seeded raspeberry Jam Handys, known in the trade as "Dick Raspers".
"Nigel, where does one acquire a Jam Handy in this borough?"
"Why Nigel, I believe one can have a quality Jam Handy down behind the Tesco's if you're in the mood for some Hartley's seedless Raspberry, 35 percent fruit, only £2.50. Bargain."
"Why thank you Nigel, you're a real chap."
"Unless you're one of those filthy Dick Raspers, in which case I'll have to call the local constabulary."
"Oh Nigel, how could you."
"And I always took you for a marmalade man. And I let you watch my children."
by Adrian Potato September 26, 2020
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Deep Handy

When your girl is giving you a hand job and she sticks her whole fist up your ass and punches your prostate
Yo, My girl was so horny the other night she gave me a Deep Handy and I blew my load all over the place.
by tongue_fu_master August 29, 2019
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Handi-Humper

Someone with with a sick fetish for disabled people.
The guy interested in your mom is a total handi-humper.
by happiFrog April 5, 2021
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Manny’s Handy

When you use the grease from a Manny’s Pizza or Taco as lube to jerk off your significant other in sheer gratitude for stuffing your face with culinary wonderment.
After dinner last night the wife gave me a Manny’s Handy on the way home!
by Trent Thick Missile October 23, 2020
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dancefloor handy

My poor behaviour at the party was eclipsed by the scandal of Tegan giving Jim a dancefloor handy.
by La-a Laker January 13, 2013
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