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read the handbook

The act of doing everything according to how social traditions and formal expectations dictate you should, usually for social acceptance by an individual or a group. One's ability to perform this act does not necessarily make them what they want to be.
Tessa: Wow! Max brought Niki flowers on the first date, opened all the doors, paid for dinner, bought expensive champagne, and walked her to her front door. What a great guy!
Andrew: Okay, he read the handbook, but so what? Is he actually an interesting guy?

Max: Yeah, I thought Niki was pretty cool. She seemed to know a lot about indie bands and films and ordered a chai latte at the coffeeshop. Then I slowly realized she was quoting Pitchfork with every other breath.
Tessa: Handbook-reader?
Max: Aye.
by p-teK April 6, 2008
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satan's handrail

The process of reviving a hand job using icy hot as lube.
Lucy gave John a fucking Satan's Handrail last Monday.
by HurtRussLE9300 November 12, 2015
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handball

The sublime art of inserting a hand into the anus, gradually becoming more popular thank god :-) also known as fisting. Involves slowly penetrating the anus using lots of lubricant until the wrist has passed the sphincter, at this point the hand will form a fist or ball inside the rectum, more advanced players proceed into the anal passage and can insert the arm even beyond the elbow in some cases, but this requires years of practice and great trust in the top. Unfortunately much doping is practiced in this sport.
We are having a handball session tonight want to give us a hand?
by Anonymous October 19, 2003
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hanabata

A Japanese term that is used in Hawaii a lot meaning "boogers", literally meaning "nose butter" in Japanese.
Akira: Eww, man, did you see that retard? He just wiped his hanabata on his shirt.
by Da Local Boi February 29, 2008
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Handmaiden

A fertile woman brought into a household where the wife is unable to conceive.
She will then help with odd jobs around the house, but will also be subject to sexual relations with the man/husband of the household in order to try and bear them a child.
She's a handmaid, she's got an amazing tale to tell.

Look at that handmaiden, she seems like she would be able to provide men with a child.
by Mrdrand June 18, 2018
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Handball

A sport in which players use their hands to hit a small rubber ball against a wall so that it bounces off in such a way that their opponent cannot return it. There are three versions of handball (four-wall, three-wall and one-wall) that can each be played by either two players(singles), three players(cut-throat) or four players(doubles).
The first recorded game of striking a ball with a hand against a wall was in Scotland in 1427, when it was recorded that King James I ordered a cellar window in his palace courtyard blocked up, as it was interfering with his game. In Ireland, the earliest written record of a similar ball game is contained in the town statutes of Galway of 1527, which forbade the playing of ball games against the walls of the town. The first depiction of an Irish form of handball does not appear till 1785. The sport of handball in Ireland was eventually standardized as Gaelic handball.
Playing Handball burns 900 calories a hour.
by Jphandball December 13, 2014
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handjam

The art of hack coders manually stuffing their crappy fixes into websites through improper means.
That loser completely handjammed those masterpage edits!
by DogEars June 20, 2011
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