Facebook

A website used to implant into a generally socially accepted person a sense of social awkwardness, when reeled in by the relentless advertisements of 'social networking', which is actually antisocial networking.
If you create and maintain a Facebook account, you may experience any of the following:
• A pseudo-friendship with hundreds of people
• Updates on people you hate's lives
• Explosive diarrhea
• Being stalked by family members
• Headaches
Juan: Idk I feel like I have no friends man...
Hardy: Well do you have a Facebook account?
by fourfinger5s November 18, 2014
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Facebook
Latin name (caetus confectorarius) meaning Social Butcher/Slaughter.

A human antisocial virus created to control the masses disguised as a form of social activity, using modern internet media to "connect" people.

There are two symptom groups for this virus.

The first is an overwhelming need to be connected to "Facebook" as often as possible, which then separates that person from interaction with people face to face due to the constant need to stay "connected".
Once a person shows this symptom it quickly spreads to all around, due to a lack of communication in person others feel the need to stay "connected" also.

The second group show symptoms like a wide range of idiotic public displays or thoughtless arguments, they then feed off Group 1 by using their need to be "connected".
Group 2 update their "status" informing Group 1 of their acts to spread the idiocracy symptom of Group 2 further by "sharing" or "debate".

Therefore Facebook is a highly efficient man made virus which creates a symbiotic food chain within its symptoms, creating the fuel it needs to control its victims and spread itself further.
You have the Facebook virus !
by Citizen Nezitic June 03, 2015
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Facebook

Where people waste their time and get in each others business, going to bankrupt the country because it's creating douchebags or just giving them a club. A stupid way to get in touch with people when you're most likely trashing people who are not on Facebook or creating a social clique of your worst nightmare, see where this will lead us down the century when a lot of cyberstalkers and bullies begin to dominate society.
Facebook is grabbing a substantial amount of followers but also a lot of haters
by Iliveinaworldoflosers5 March 13, 2012
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A website that's tricked everyone in the world into thinking it's a super cool site when it's really a copy of Myspace minus the awesome customization.
Stupid Guy: I love Facebook. It's awesome.
Smart Guy: What makes it better than any other site?
Stupid Guy: It's Facebook. It's just "better."
by The_Shagster June 24, 2011
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A friendly way for kids to compete with one another in their perception of their own popularity. More specifically, the number of friends they have recorded, number of pictures they have tagged/ been tagged in, and the variety of comments on their "walls." Ironically created by a bitter, unpopular nerd.
Mike claims he has a facebook to "connect" with friends. In reality, Mike has a facebook to ensure others will believe he leads an enviable, popular life and to jack off to the bikini pictures of girls he managed to make contact with.
by breh breh October 04, 2011
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an addictive shit-hole where people in from either school or work add you. stalkers dream in other words.
person 1 on le phone typing
person 2: what are you doing?
person 1: I'm on Facebook.
by usernameforurbandictionary September 14, 2011
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"Facebook ruined my relationship, because my gf saw the picture i posted of me cheating with that girl with the huge tits, that i thought i made private."

"Don't act like you didn't like her status!"

"Why are you in her top friends?"
by Azaleah Black January 17, 2012
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