computer

The reason I can't enjoy my weekends anymore. The almighty consumer of time. This machine will eat your soul and sell the last few bits on eBay.

What? Explorer froze on my computer's process manager? I'll just end and then start the process again. (desktop crashes)

by Anonymous 3.00 BETA February 21, 2009

competence porn

Competence porn is a plot with a type of character who is insanely good at something - usually involving some plot-twisting plans.

Coined by Reddit user Rabbithen.

Some of the main characters in shows like: Breaking Bad, Sherlock, Code Geass, Death Note, Dexter, Mad Men, Doctor House, House of Cards, White Collar, Prison Break, Limitless, Big Love, Hannibal, The Bourne Identity, Jack Reacher

provide you with competence porn.

by charlemagne March 5, 2014

Dell Computers

Piece of shit computers. I can shit computers better than those. Theses unsuspecting people see the ads of the stupid little pot head screamin DUDE UR GETTIN A DELL and get drawn to it. They shit the bed after like 4 months than u call there high quality support and stay on the phone with some dickhead hoo rambles for 4 hours about the wrong thig

Johnny: Watta u doin?
Jimmy: Im playin on my four month old dell.
CRASH
Johnny: Dude ur computer jus crashed.
Jimmy: No prob ill call their great support.
4 hous later......
Support man: CHING CHONG CHO ME CHIN LALALALALALA
Jimmy: Fuck u im getting a Compaq

by Carlos September 24, 2004

Competencentracion

(Com-pe-ten-sen-traction)
When you concerntrate really hard on something and it’s escaping your mind a little bit but then you get it.

“I knew I knew what I was talking about and then I competencentraciatied (plural of competencentracion) enough that the answer became clear”

by Drunk Anonymous December 7, 2018

computergasm

Orgasmic behavior caused by extreme delight with some aspect of a computer.

She had a computergasm when she saw a picture of her kitty on her new 24 inch widescreen monitor.

by Crawford Best February 18, 2008

Computerologist

One who fixes computer systems.

Aww man!My computer is crashing.Can you fix it?
No man! Do I look like a freaking computerologist to you?!

by janets February 24, 2010

computer hypochondria

While hypochondria is the fear of doing anything without getting a fatal injury/illness, computer hypochondria is the fear of downloading anything, no matter how verified the download is, in fear that it will screw up your computer in some way or another.

I'd download this .exe file, but I don't want to get a BSoD.

Dude, you have some bad computer hypochondria.

by Christophucked March 27, 2011