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turtle-brained

Thinking slowly, like a turtle moves.
oy. i am sooo slow today - i am turtle-brained today.
by Puffin Man June 13, 2011
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Bacon Turtle

A Turtle, usually a King Turtle of the Royal Turtle Guard. Also a word for assorted meats shaped like a turtle.

A Bacon Turtle loves bacon and spreads the word and belief of Bacon. Bacon Turtles and Turtles alike are enemies of the Panda Army and the Penguin Union. The King Bacon Turtle was defeated at The Puffin-Koala Gap by the Pan-da Warriors in PANDA 7 (Panda Years), and he later retreated to plot an all-out war on the Panda Army. The Bacon Turtle and his Royal Turtle Guard is no match for the Elite Pan-da Warriors.

The Bacon Turtle began at a humble little wood building on the corner of a busy street, titled: Bacon Turtle & Associates. They sold chocolate-covered bacon and bacon shaped like turtles. Since then, they have grown into a legitomato army. The Bacon Turtle and his associates are the exclusive members of the I Don't Care Club. The Turtle Motto is "Viva la Bacon, TGIF" (Long Live Bacon, Thank God It's Friday).
Bacon Turtle: Kneel before your almighty ruler, the Bacon Turtle!
Panda: No.
Bacon Turtle: Then you will face a life of bacon deprivation. Take him away, Royal Turtle Guard!
Panda: Is this some sort of torture, because I'm not addicted to bacon...
Bacon Turtle: Are you insulting my religion? Do you wish to say that you are against bacon? You will be locked in a room with bacon!
Panda: Free bacon is fine with me...

Epic Meal Time: We're cooking up some BACON, AND TURTLES! THAT MEANS BACON TURTLES!
by Panda Army Representative January 16, 2014
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Turtle Lei

this is a correction of grammer and name for the one that was posted before this one

Turtle Lei stands for short, small eyes, gamer raging trash player at almost any game he plays
random dude: headshots with AK in a perfectly normal way that does not require an explaination to know how he headshoted him
turtle lei: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HACKER IMA GO REPORT THIS MF
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Land turtle

Madelyn is a land turtle not a fish
Omg look at Madelyn she is a land turtle.
by anonymous May 10, 2022
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two handed turtle

when someone gives a guy a handjob with one hand and catches his shit with the other as its coming out of his ass.
David: Hey man! Little Red gave me a two handed turtle last night.
by muleymomma May 19, 2014
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Sick turtle

Someone who is slow, (Crippled) and gets sick a lot; because they have a weak immune system.
by Sick turtle September 23, 2016
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Turtle Elitism

A strange phenomenon mostly native to Urban Dictionary where the top entries about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles feel the need to bitch and whine about Power Rangers. It is parallel,but not entirely similar,to the way a medium handful of people from the old internet proclaimed cartoons to be superior to anime and hated anything animated in Japan,although Power Rangers is technically an adaptation of Super Sentai and not Japanese,however the parallels are still there. An additional thing to note is that the two series have both crossed over multiple times,be it in television or comic form,and as of writing the two are currently in franchise development hell or at least close to it.
EXAMPLE ONE:
Tommy: "I like Power Rangers."
Larry (while violently convulsing): "FUCK YOU POWER RANGER FANS FOR RUINING TMNT WITH YOUR SISSY ZORDS,THE TURTLES COULD KICK THE RANGER'S ASSES ANY DAY OF THE WEEK!"
Tommy: "Keep your Turtle Elitism to yourself,you old douchebag. Also,which rangers specifically?"
Larry: "FUCK!"

EXAMPLE TWO:
Frank: "I'm sick of seeing Turtle Elitism every time I look up the definition of the TMNT on Urban Dictionary."
Mari: "Why were you looking up the definition of TMNT on Urban Dictionary in the first place?"
Frank: "Boredom."
by Lazthedictionist July 31, 2024
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