Jerk off and smoke Newports

A figurative description of an attitude towards life, as well as your immediate and distant surroundings. When you refer to yourself or someone else 'just Jerking off and smoking Newports',, you are simply trying to convey that you/they are not letting anything current issue take their mind off themselves. It is the most self-absorbed and least constructive activity imaginable.

Once I get my pension, I am just gonna retreat to my apartment in Des Moines, and then I'm just gonna jerk off and smoke Newports until Yellowstone does us all in, THAT's my 5-year plan!

I tried to pursuade him to get more involved in student politics, but he just sits in his room jerking off and smoking Newports like these things don't affect him!

by how-young-people-talk March 31, 2020

Jerking Off June

Jerking Off June: To jerk off as much as you can during June

Person 1: "I don't want to jerk off"
Person 2: "But its Jerking Off June"
Person 1: "FUCK"

by zSynergy October 12, 2022

Nvm I jerked off

A phrase used by a person who is down bad and then regret a certain action committed.
It is commonly associated with post-nut clarity

- What's her OF?
10 minutes later
- Nvm I jerked off

- You're so beautiful
- Marry me?
- Nvm I jerked off, you mean nothing to me

by WillieDog February 17, 2025

No Jerk off January

In the month of january you are not aloud to masturbate in any way. Its like NNN but nutting and sex is allowed

-Hey Jimmy, no jerking off while watching porn cause Its no jerk off january

by Minecrafter69_420 November 04, 2019

jerking off a dude

Jerking off a dude is a synonym to hugging a dude in certain hoods of the United Kingdom

A: I always jerk off my homies when we meet for the last time in a while
B You gay bro?
A: Man what's wrong with hugging your homies, we use jerking off a dude as another word for hugging

by 02idbbsq0wbsdb September 12, 2021

jerking off with happiness

You like the pleasure your self in a sexual way to cause a slight of happiness which is not given to you by a women at this point.

I'm having a wank because I'm lonely, so jerking off with happiness is the way to go.

by Jesus da bomb January 28, 2014

Sex addicted jamesy jerking off to crap

my theory is that (ANALOG HORROR CREATOR) isn't working on (ANALOG HORROR) because (SEXUAL REASON)!!! surely this wont make every (ANALOG HORROR) fan uncomfortable!
(makes every (ANALOG HORROR) fan uncomfortable)
GRR... HOW DARE THESE PEOPLE GET UNCOMFORTABLE BECAUSE I SEXUALIZE (ANALOG HORROR CREATOR) FOR NOT WORKING ON (ANALOG HORROR)!!!!
I CAN'T BELIEVE NOBODY WILL LET ME SEXUALIZE MINORS!!! HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO REACT!!!

Sex addicted jamesy jerking off to crap is WEIRD!!!

by 1willwoodfan0 May 30, 2023