Masturhating

The act of hating things that no one else cares about alone. Repeatedly.

"Julie has been masturhating like mad! She bitches constantly about hating her boss, but no one else gives a fuck."

by adrug December 27, 2007

masturbating

Having sex with your own hand or even using a fake dick (dildo) in the case of girls (or very messed up guys)... its very pathetic.

John is masturbating every night because he has no hope of ever having actual sex.

by CanHasHaxx February 5, 2009

ego masturbating

verb, intransitive The act of looking up oneself's first name on urbandictionary in an attempt to produce an ego high by reading the overflow of entries made by other people complementing their boyfriend or girlfriend. Those who exhibit this phenomenon typically have a forever alone relationship status, do not receive complements from family and friends, or, if done in the company of others, are being attention whores.

Olive: Hey look, guys! I looked up my name on urbandictionary, look at all the nice things people have said about me!

Joe: Shut the fuck up, you ego masturbating attention whore.

by didnotstealhisbike July 25, 2011

Masturbating

what you do when you see your Grandpa.

Grandpa: *leaves room*

You: *Starts jerking off and Masturbating*

by The master of masturbating November 16, 2020

Masturbating

what you do when you see your Grandpa.

Grandpa: *leaves room*

You: *Starts jerking off and Masturbating*

by The master of masturbating November 16, 2020

Masturbating

What you were trying to do when your Mom caught you.

Chad were you masturbating?
No Mom my pants just slipped down and I was pulling them up!

by Squidbob October 12, 2021

Masturbating

Something you do when you need a quick fix because the real thing isn't available.

Jerry: Hey what are you up to?
Frank: I'm masturbating.
Jerry: Ok hit me up when your done.

by Jiggywithit455 June 12, 2022