Crumpet muffin

The thing kids say to be cool instead of saying mother fucker.

You crumpet muffin!

by Yolo beast yolo loo March 18, 2014

Crumpet crippler

The act of shitting out the digested remains of a crumpet, placing it on one’s hand, and slapping one in the genitals until they orgasm uncontrollably leaving them paralysed.

Steve, I’m horny. Give me a crumpet crippler.

by Scousebirdcoleen October 10, 2019

Crumpet stuffer

A derogatory term used to describe the British and their obsession with tea and crumpets.

American: "Here comes the Crumpet stuffer!"

by He8i3 May 04, 2022

Strumpet Crumpet

Strumpet Crumpet A hottie and great in bed

That Strumpet Crumpet is hot and sexy

by VileGay September 21, 2023

Crumpet Bumper

A person who prefers to engage in sexual activities with an older woman

"Cory really seems to be into older women"
"Ya, he's a real crumpet bumper"

by AnAverageNormalEveryDayGuy March 20, 2024

British Crumpet Clapper

When a British man nuts between a British girl's ass and she twerks it up her back

Man: I just gave me girlfriend a British Crumpet Clapper
Other man:Wtf is wrong with you

by May 14, 2021

Donald Crumpet

Any depressing fact about Donald Trump that you must digest.

How many Donald Crumpets are in one newspaper?

by Ereck Flowers October 23, 2018