hitting the john

#1.
Using the bathroom.

#2.
Alternate phrase for "smoking a joint." Used when the "authorities" are around, as a discreet way to let fellow stoners know what you just did/are going to do, because it sounds like #1 to virgin ears.

1.
I went downstairs after hitting the john.

2.
MOM: What were you two doing?

KID 1: We were hitting the john!

KID 2: Yeah!

KID 3: (laughs)

by Zolotros March 30, 2010

I'm John

Used to imitate someone in a mocking tone; to point out there flaws or weaknesses by a comparison to "stupid John."

"Hey guys, I got a B on my physics test."
"I'm John... I like cock..."

by I'mJohn October 23, 2009

hit the john

Going to go use the bathroom

Hey I'm going to go hit the John I'll be right back

by Jake Olson March 24, 2016

Matt John

a gorgeous, cockey, son of a bitch. This is the type of guy you want to lick their face off but then remember he is a total piece of shit

oh my gosh! tom just totally pulled a Matt John on stacy

by shamer315 February 13, 2017

john jones

John Jones is the dull guy that you see at a party sniffing some girls hair. He is normal but odd and has no sense of humor. He also can sometimes resemble a blob fish.

Person 1: He is kinda a John Jones.
Person 2: Oh he is totally a John Jones!!!

by Dolphin Dancing May 31, 2016

Al John

A very tall and handsome guy, typically has a harem of 10 girls

Al John is very charming everyday.

by 14324243 September 26, 2020

John Edwards

Cuckoo. The pot calling the kettle black. A disgusting and hypocritical trial lawyer who got rich by sewing health care providers who is now ironically in the US Senate and running for President of the United States as a Democrat. Whoda thunk it? He attacked other rich persons, particularly George W. Bush for allegedly being out of touch with mainstream America, claiming he (Edwards) is “the only ‘real’ middle class American in the Presidential race,” yet he is not just one of North Carolina’s richest persons but considered the “most affluent” candidate in the running. He’s is a laughingstock, hypocrite and a liar.

John Edwards is among one of the groups of people that is most wrong with this country and wants to run for President. God help us.

by [e-mail] August 9, 2007