Russian Sasquatch

The Russian Sasquatch is the act of when I man shoves his hairy foot up a woman’s anus and her vagina at the same time, causing her to scream uncontrollably and have her knocked unconscious from the pain

Boy :Last night I gave my sister a Russian Sasquatch, her asshole was torn inside out.....her vagina was turned into a faucet

Girl : I’m next up for that shit nigga

by Sexual Alien May 9, 2018

Russian Crucifix

A form of torture where a person is bolted to a crucifix through their wrists, elbows and shoulders for their arms and ankles, knees and hips for their legs. Eight car batteries are then attached to the bolts from ankle to knee, knee to hip, wrist to elbow and elbow to shoulder. The result is usually non lethal.

Bri gave Sergio a Russian Crucifix for cheating on her.

by DaEif January 8, 2016

Russian Jesus

The man who walked on tanks

Turned water into Vodka

Gave children trench coats

His mom was a mob boss

His dad was a whore

Did you hear about Russian Jesus? He is GOD

by Mr. Jesus.com March 23, 2022

Russian Schlong Whipping

When your uncle comes over from his weekly visit from Russia, you must bend over and pledge alliegence to his whip. Bend over and let him whip your ballsack until it rips open and your kidney beans fall out. Proceed to cut off the strings and cook them on a Bunsen burner and serve with a side of mayonnaise and brown mustard. Cut off our Weiner and put in a hot dog bun. Serve with the blood of your enemies. Sit naked on a spiked chair and watch him majestically eat them. Have Fun!

Can't wait until my uncle domes over from Russia and gives me the best Russian Schlong Whipping of my life!

by Shaedy September 20, 2018

Russian tap water

A cocktail consisting of

• Vodka
• Water

Oh dude can you order me a Russian tap water, I’ll pay you back later

by SammyHammy May 25, 2023

Russian Promise

A guarantee, treaty, or solemn oath made with the absolute intention of breaking it the moment it becomes strategically convenient. It is a specific type of gaslighting where the aggressor loudly proclaims a desire for peace or cooperation solely to buy time, distract their victim, or maneuver their forces for a surprise attack.

"I really thought my ex was going to change after he swore he deleted the dating apps, but it was just a Russian Promise. He was actually just stalling to line up a new girlfriend before dumping me."

by carroarmato0 December 12, 2025

Russianing

When you speak russian unironically in the most random context

"I can't understand my friend while they are russianing."

by Bean_BoiTheBest May 22, 2022