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soccer mom

I know that not ALL "soccer moms" are like this...So, I'm just going to define the STEREOTYPICAL "soccer mom".

A middle/lower-upperclass caucasian (9 times out of 10) female between the ages of 25-45. Known for their huge SUVs and mini-vans laden with corny bumper stickers. Very (hyper)active members in the school district (PTA, school board, etc.). Usually has at least 3 kids...blah, blah, blah. Also famous for the "sweater on shoulders tied sleeves in front" look.

But basically, a chick who still bases her life on the bullshit foundation that women were put on this earth to cook, clean, make babies, and raise babies. Their husbands are never around, because they're probably cheating, because more than likely, she's become more overweight and more unattractive with a drastically declining sex drive...But the soccer mom is to busy picking up little Rebecca and Timmy from karate class to notice.
Again, not all "soccer moms" are like this...but then, that wouldn't make them soccer mom now would it?
by PS, I'm Black April 21, 2008
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soccer mom

-a single unit out of an army of hitler clones that went horribly wrong
the modern mg42 can also be referred to as a soccer mom's asscrack
by noobinessthe3rd August 15, 2009
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soccer dad

Exactly the opposite of a soccer mom. Soccer dads will let their kids do anything the soccer mom forbids them, like Internet or TV or swearing. Soccer dads drive minivans/SUVs, much like the soccer mom.
Guy: Ahhh fucking shoe! For fuck's sake will Nike stop making such shitty uncomfortable shoes? (dont mean it actually)
Soccer Dad: Hey kids, look over to that guy swearing at his shoe. He is a cool guy and I want you to be like him.
by Jack The Black Cock September 8, 2015
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soccer mom

the worst people next to to the guys at peta.they are always enforcing censorship,taking their kids to sporting event that the don't wan't compete in,and going to pta meetings
Me:hey dude,have you heard blood sugar sex magik?

Soccer Mom:how could your parents let you listen to that smut!
me:well,because my parents don't care if a song has cuss words in it.they know its not their decsion whast i listen to.
later i come in contact with the same soccer mom while playing my on hot minute cd
Soccer Mom:turn that stuff off!there are children present!

I grab my machette and slice her head off and continue my day
by futuramafan May 26, 2008
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Soccer Sara

The center of the entire soccer world. Girls wanna be her, guys wanna be WITH her, she is the center of the universe. Sometimes a bit firey, but it gives her the edge over everyone. Don't get in soccer sara's face cuz she will fuck you up! And if you are a fellow soccer player, expect to be shown up! You do not want to be on the field with a Soccer Sara!
soccer sara sports futbol kickass Soccer Sara
by sleep-over-N March 17, 2010
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soccer mom

Drive huge SUVs, are the cause of a lot of car accidents. They feel entitled since everything was handed to them on a silver platter. Really rude, and seen yelling at people in the stores at 1 pm in the afternoon in their ugly gym clothes. They probably think Africa is a country.
Censor everything by creating a bubble for their sheltered children.Their daughters are usually dumb blonde sluts, and their sons play sports & are usually stupid bullies. She thinks her kids are the sweetest people ever, but she doesnt know they have a secret dark side of watching porn, sleeping around, doing drugs, and bullying others in school.Children are forced down the same path as their soccer moms life causing the unfortunate cycle to repeat. sometimes the child is intelligent enough they will REBEL and become a hippie, OR just go off adventuring in the Peace Corps to experience the life they were sheltered from.
by jamesmc534 November 17, 2013
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National Soccer Day

July 28th is national soccer day. So go play some soccer and have some fun!
by imacoolkid1 April 17, 2020
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