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Eagan's Law

A law that governs the flow of unfortunate events in time. Applies equally to philosophical, physical, mental, and emotional conflicts. Eagan's Law states that:

"Given a specific set of circumstances, the most personally inconvenient outcome of a situation will always be the end result. Should one make a decision to enact a more convenient solution, that solution will end up becoming more inconvenient than the first.

However, in the event that one recognizes the potential of the most inconvenient outcome, an equally inconvenient but unforeseen outcome shall take its place."

Over the years, many have equated Eagan's Law with Murphy's Law, which holds that "anything that can go wrong will go wrong." Although the two are similar in subject matter, Eagan's Law provides a more comprehensive understanding of unfortunate phenomena than Murphy's Law. Murphy himself admitted this often, crediting Eagan's Law as the basis of much of his own work (citation needed).
Josh: "I went all the way back to the front of the store for a cart, and now we don't even need it. Plus, it's the one with the shitty wheel."

Andrew: "Chalk that one up to Eagan's Law.
by steffescope March 5, 2012
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Phoenix's Law

The idea that "If it can be eaten, it will be eaten."
Sorry I ate your sandwich man...Phoenix's Law ya know?
by Lampposteffect February 26, 2011
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Sumner's Law

Harley Davidson riders don't wave because they think they are too bad. BMW riders don't wave because they think they are too good.
Sumner's Law is true. When I ride my Honda Gold Wing, I always wave at fellow riders, but Harley Davidson and BMW riders never wave back.
by biker Phil August 17, 2011
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CJ Law

States that any relationship advice given to your friends will work perfectly, while the same advice will backfire miserably if used by the advice giver
Guy #1: "Dude, that advice you gave me was great! I got five chicks' phone numbers!"

Guy #2: "Really? Maybe I should try it."

(One minute later; Guy#2 comes back, limping)

Guy #1: "Well, what happened?"

Guy #2: "Apparently a punch in the face and a kick to the crotch is the new way to reject people. Stupid CJ Law."
by joecity7 October 24, 2011
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unjust law

The only type of law that's made to be broken.
* example of unjust law in the 1950's*
"do-gooder": What are you doing? You know your not allowed to bring black people into your house. That's illegal.
Actual good person: Dude, people were throwing rocks at him, I had to get him inside.
"do-gooder": YOU REBEL!!! CRIMINAL SCUM LIKE YOURSELF NEED TO BE LOCKED AWAY IN PRISON!!!
Actual good person: Says the person who stones black people for fun.
by Dubiks November 30, 2018
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Miley's Law

A law that was put into place in 2013 that protects foam fingers from any form of sexual harassment or sexual assault, named in honor of a foam finger, who because of a horrifying assault on live TV, is still in therapy to this day
Millions of foam fingers will be safe, thanks to Miley's Law
by Metallicajunkie October 18, 2018
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pepe's law

anything that can be memed, will be memed.
"why do they keep meming spongebob?"
"because of pepe's law my dude."
by creed of travis September 1, 2018
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