Teddy bear Asshole

A person who is overly candid, but means to do no harm.

One who angers others with their views or opinions, but would never become violent or angry themselves.

Someone who is outspoken, but harmless.

"John always makes people angry with his political views, but he is just a teddy bear asshole."

"beth comes across like a jerk, but she is really harmless...nothing but a teddy bear asshole.

Teddy bear Asshole by Jambo Truthbomb July 25, 2011

A compliment asshole 

Someone who compliments you but clearly doesn't mean it.

"Hey, Mark. That was a great performance. Very loud."
"Hey, Stephanie. do you know Mark? He is such a compliment asshole."

A compliment asshole by tautau the bice October 2, 2014

Jesus Christ up the asshole 

Someone so religious that they would take Jesus' dick up the asshole if the bible said so.

Dude your girlfriend would take Jesus Christ up the asshole before you.

Jesus Christ up the asshole by John OHHH YEAH January 25, 2009

What an asshole... 

1. In the context of a conversation:
a)A way of commenting that a third party is an asshole
b)An under-the-breath muttering in response to some offense, essentially a roundabout way of calling the offender an "asshole." Can be used seriously or for humor.
2. In the context of a single party speaking: A way of recognizing that the previous comments made were insensitive.

Allan:...and then Kareem punched me in the balls
Nish: what an asshole...

Kareem: Oh shit, I just spilled coffee on your laptop
Allan: What an asshole...

Kareem: Your relationship is doomed to fail
Vaishnavi: What an asshole...

Kareem: I'm sorry.. I couldn't hold it in...
Natsuki: What an asshole...

Kareem: ...but then I slapped her. What an asshole.

What an asshole... by aznhazmat February 1, 2009

Tailor your asshole 

Tailoring an asshole is a very delicate procedure where a man with a beard of great girth licks your asshole. This is a very delicate process because he must lick it like an ice cream scoop on top of a cone. His beard may touch, but only on the cheeks never getting in the way of the actual anus. Due to this delicate process a sober hobo or bum can be used, but is not recommended.

Mustaches of any kind, neck beards, goatees, and mutton chops are not suitable substitutes.

"I got my asshole tailored so good last night by some guy at the party." - White Young Female in her 20's

"Bitch, I will tailor your asshole so good tonight!" -Older Black Gentleman in his 40's

Tailor your asshole by Crusty Peas February 4, 2013

puckering asshole

When ones asshole becomes pouty & wet from sweat as a result of arousal.

"I was preparing to penetrate from behind when I saw his puckering asshole tho, I couldn't help but stare & admire it's juicyness"

puckering asshole by Thotler💁 July 23, 2015

smashed asshole sandwich 

Nasty stink mouth. The worst bad breath you ever smelled. Bad enough, you still smell it 10 minutes after the dude leaves.

Oh fuck me blind Faith. Did you talk to John this morning? He smells like he ate a smashed asshole sandwich.

smashed asshole sandwich by kingmarki December 10, 2006