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karl malone

A Basketball Player in the NBA for the LA Lakers. Despite being 42, wearing ripped Jerseys and despite having sholders bigger than his head hes a good player. His Alias is the mailman

# Selected in 1996 as one of the "50 Greatest Players in NBA History"
# Two-time NBA Most Valuable Player (1996-97, 1998-99), one of only nine players in NBA history to win the Maurice Podoloff Trophy more than once
# Eleven-time All-NBA First Team selection (1988-89, 1989-90, 1990-91, 1991-92, 1992-93, 1993-94, 1994-95, 1995-96, 1996-97, 1997-98 and 1998-99), two-time All-NBA Second Team selection (1987-88 and 1999-2000), and a 2000-01 All-NBA Third Team selection
# Three-time NBA All-Defensive First Team selection (1996-97, 1997-98 and 1998-99) and a 1987-88 NBA All-Defensive Second Team selection
# Fourteen-time NBA All-Star selection who played in 12 games (missed 1990 game due to injury and the 2002 game due to family illness), including 10 consecutive contests from 1991 to 2001
# Named MVP of the 1989 All-Star Game in Houston after registering 28 points and nine rebounds, and named co-MVP with teammate John Stockton of the 1993 All-Star Game in Salt Lake City after tallying 28 points and 10 rebounds
# Ranks second all-time in points scored with 36,374, behind only Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (38,387)
# Holds the NBA record most consecutive seasons scoring 2,000 or more points (11, 1987-88 to 1997-98) and shares the record with Michael Jordan for most career 2,000 point seasons (11, 1987-88 to 1997-98)
# Tied Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (17) for most consecutive seasons scoring at least 20.0 points per game (17, 1986-87 to 2002-03)
# Scored a career-high 61 points, the most by a Jazz player since the franchise moved to Utah, against the Milwaukee Bucks on 1/27/90
# Scored a Jazz playoff-record 50 points and grabbed 12 boards against the Seattle SuperSoncics on 4/22/00
# Holds the NBA record for most seasons leading the league in free-throws made (seven, 1988-89 to 1992-93, 1996-97, 1997-98) and most consecutive seasons leading the league in free-throws made (1988-89 to 1992-93)
# Passed Moses Malone (8,531) to become the NBA's all-time leader in free throws made on 3/24/01 vs. the Washington Wizards
# Became the all-time leader in free throws attepmted on 12/10/01 against the Mavericks
# Ranks second all-time in field-goals made with 13,335 behind only Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (15,837)
# Ranks second all-time in minutes played at 53,479, trailing only Kareem Abdul-Jabbar (57,446)
# Ranks seventh all-time in rebounds, with 14,601
# Appeared in the 1997 and 1998 NBA Finals against the Chicago Bulls
# Named to the 1985-86 NBA All-Rookie Team and finished third in Rookie of the Year balloting after averaging 14.9 ppg and 8.9 rpg
# A member of the men's basketball "Dream Team" that won the gold medal at the 1992 Summer Olympics in Barcelona and the 1996 Dream Team that won gold in Atlanta
# Winner of the 1997-98 IBM Award
# During career, named NBA Player of the Week 22 times and NBA Player of the Month seven times
# Notched his third career triple-double with game-highs of 29 points (11-13 FG) and 12 rebounds, and 10 assists, in a 99-82 win over the L.A. Clippers on 5/4/99; recorded his second career triple-double with 32 points, 13 rebounds and 10 assists against the Toronto Raptors on 2/27/97
# Twelve-time NBA All-Interview First Team selection and 1999-2000 All-Interview Second Team selection

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Steve Nash: Who the fuck just elbowed me in jaw

Karl Malone: It was me Karl Malone
by Marc July 26, 2004
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maltown

The place where trespassers will be shot, and survivers will be shot again.
by malton November 18, 2006
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Related Words
malton Maltonian Milton malone Marlton Maxton melton Malon maloney Maldon

malto

Something so incredible, it would cause Stephen Hawking to actually say "Hax!"
Guy 1: Those ninja just killed stole the A-Team van without BA Barrachus noticing!

Guy 2: That's so malto!
by Sanada.san September 27, 2005
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karl malone

A black, Republican, redneck who had a great NBA career (while ball hogging, elbow throwing, and earning zero NBA Championship rings). He is as backwards as a Klan's man and more ignorant than Bill O'Reilly. Knocked up a 13 year old and proceeded to disown her and his son. Also fathered WNBA star, Cheryl Ford, who he ignored all her life up untill she became famous and successful. What a classy guy.
Karl Malone should be rotting in a Louisianna jail cell to this day for statatory rape.
by petey pablo21 February 16, 2009
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Bloody Malone

The Bloody Malone is to have sex with a woman in such a position that her legs are over your head and there is a pillow underneath her ass, Much like the conventional missionary although you must penetrate so hard and fast that she bleeds vaginally.
Guy 1: Man, I had some awesome sex last night
Guy 2: Yeah? tell me about it
Guy 1: Awh I gave it to her so hard I gave her a Bloody Malone
by Bullet Rico June 22, 2010
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Milton Academy

A prep school in Massachusetts which, although academically excellent, has suffered enormous bad press because of the actions of a few. The student body is incredibly intelligent and independent (albeit not very unified).
It has its share of normal teenage hormonal behavior, but, contrary to some news reports, is not home to extravagant orgies. Even the stereotypical stoners and shallow DSGs tend to be surprisingly intelligent. The administration occasionally feeds the students feel-good, politically correct crap. Boarders are very loyal to their dorms, and day students rally under the 'because our parents love us' slogan... such is life.
Nobles Kid: It'll be, like, really funny if we drive by Milton Academy and honk our horn, like, really loud at them!!! *guffaws*

Techie: *hiss* All your base are belong to us.

Freshman: *blinks*

DSG: Daddy's buying me these giant, fuzzy Uggs!

Speechie: *slinks off to rejoin his evil speechie clan*

Student Body: OHHHH SIXXX!! FOOOOORBES! YEAH HALLOWELL!! etc.
by i_am_sam89 July 26, 2008
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Marlton

A South Jersey town that 40-50 years ago was nothing but Farms and open space and hicks. Today the town is over developed the traffic is a nightmare, there's Wawa's, Bank's, Rite Aid's and small stupid shopping malls on every freaking corner. Most people that live in Marlton are Middle-Upper class, and act like complete snot heads that think they're better then everyone else and like their crap doesn't smell, especially the kids. Most Kids get everything handed to them from Mommy and Daddy, they lack the meaning of work ethic and that money doesn't grow on trees. A Town named after dirt as alluded too in a earlier post. The jock mentality is definally in full effect here in Marlton. The Kids have humongous egos, but yet cannot fight, but just talk big and tough but are small as munchkins that try and act getto but would die in Camden and Philly. Also Heroin high was so 10-15 years ago..
"wow look at that senior from Marlton acting all tough, rumor has it he cannot even bench 60 pounds. "
by Uncle Henry the Idol December 10, 2009
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