A Christian religion that do not waver from the teachings of the bible. They do not allow homosexual priests to teach their children they do not allow celebrations of pagan festivities. They are the only religion that use gods name and do not disrespect him by calling him lord.He has a name.
Jehovahs Witnesses
by shaylove69 July 9, 2011
Get the Jehovahs Witnesses mug.a person that believes that jehovah is their creater and also follows monotheism strongly. they also knock on people's door to try and get them to join their religion.
by im_the_Bomb June 15, 2009
Get the jehovah's witness mug.Related Words
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A trick/excuse claiming to be a Jehovah's Witness. Used when purposely/accidentally forgetting holidays/occasions.
"What did you get your girlfriend for Christmas?"
"I used the jehovah trick on her so I didn't have to get her anything."
"I used the jehovah trick on her so I didn't have to get her anything."
by littoivan March 17, 2008
Get the jehovah trick mug.An extremely annoying cult that brainwashes little children into not excepting blood transfusions to save their life. If you are baptized and want to leave, they will "disfellowship" you and the consequences are that your family and friends who are JW's are not allowed to associate with you anymore.
They are a bunch of hypocritical fanatic bible thumpers who criticise all non-JW's, but just sit around in their Kingdom Halls and talk about how good they are and how bad everything in the world is. They just sit there and discuss the same fucking thing during every meeting.
The are a complete waste and drain on society and the economy. They do not contribute positive in anyway. They are just sitting around waiting for the world to end, which when it does all JW's will get into the new system and all non-JW's will be killed by god!
They are a bunch of hypocritical fanatic bible thumpers who criticise all non-JW's, but just sit around in their Kingdom Halls and talk about how good they are and how bad everything in the world is. They just sit there and discuss the same fucking thing during every meeting.
The are a complete waste and drain on society and the economy. They do not contribute positive in anyway. They are just sitting around waiting for the world to end, which when it does all JW's will get into the new system and all non-JW's will be killed by god!
Husband: How was your day, dear?
Wife: Oh, two Jehovah's Witnesses knocked on the door at 7am this morning and I immediately told them I was disfellowedshipped. The two young men screamed like girls and ran back to their car.
Husband: Where's dinner?
Wife: Oh, two Jehovah's Witnesses knocked on the door at 7am this morning and I immediately told them I was disfellowedshipped. The two young men screamed like girls and ran back to their car.
Husband: Where's dinner?
by squish squashy May 9, 2006
Get the jehovah's witnesses mug.by pee pee poo poo check October 12, 2020
Get the Jehonathan mug.*Jehovah's Witness knocks on man's door*
Witness: Hello, sir, do you have time to talk about his Holy Grace Lord and Saviour Jesus?
Michael: GET OUT OF HERE OR I WILL CURSE YOU FOR I am SATAN! *starts flailing and rolling on the floor*
* Witness runs away*
Jehovah's Witness repellent
See? Easy.
Witness: Hello, sir, do you have time to talk about his Holy Grace Lord and Saviour Jesus?
Michael: GET OUT OF HERE OR I WILL CURSE YOU FOR I am SATAN! *starts flailing and rolling on the floor*
* Witness runs away*
Jehovah's Witness repellent
See? Easy.
by EasternEuropeanSlavLover January 27, 2022
Get the jehovah's witness repellent mug.Let me first say I am a Jehovah's Witness so what I am going to say is what we actaully believe in.
Jehovah is the name of God and we are His witnesses to carry on His word through the Bible.
We do not believe in the Trinity, Jehovah is God and Jesus is His son.
We believe blood transfusions are wrong and this is because in the Bible it says not to use the blood of others (or at least in that similiar sense)
We are NOT a cult if we get money it is from members of the Kingdom Hall we don't just knock on your door and say Hey can we have your money.
We come to your door because we want everyone to have knowledge of Jehovah (and when we come to your door we show respect and it would be nice to get it in return)
We don't celebrate the holidays because they are considered pagen so we do not particpate.
We follow the Bible it points us in the right direction and gives us faith and allows us to gain knowledge of Jehovah and His son Jesus.
We also believe that once you die you are cleared of your sins and you can live in paradise but if you try to go back to sinful ways you will be gone.
We believe there is not a Hell where you burn for eternity because of a life of wrong-doing and everyone does not go to Heaven only the chosen few, when you die the dead are unconcious of everything but you will be awaken by Jesus to live in the world of paradise.
I might not be right about every aspect but this is what I have learned through my father and I am only 16 so I have time to correct myself. I just wanted to do this because so many have a wrong impression of the people who are the same religion as me, and I wanted to give them correct information.
Jehovah is the name of God and we are His witnesses to carry on His word through the Bible.
We do not believe in the Trinity, Jehovah is God and Jesus is His son.
We believe blood transfusions are wrong and this is because in the Bible it says not to use the blood of others (or at least in that similiar sense)
We are NOT a cult if we get money it is from members of the Kingdom Hall we don't just knock on your door and say Hey can we have your money.
We come to your door because we want everyone to have knowledge of Jehovah (and when we come to your door we show respect and it would be nice to get it in return)
We don't celebrate the holidays because they are considered pagen so we do not particpate.
We follow the Bible it points us in the right direction and gives us faith and allows us to gain knowledge of Jehovah and His son Jesus.
We also believe that once you die you are cleared of your sins and you can live in paradise but if you try to go back to sinful ways you will be gone.
We believe there is not a Hell where you burn for eternity because of a life of wrong-doing and everyone does not go to Heaven only the chosen few, when you die the dead are unconcious of everything but you will be awaken by Jesus to live in the world of paradise.
I might not be right about every aspect but this is what I have learned through my father and I am only 16 so I have time to correct myself. I just wanted to do this because so many have a wrong impression of the people who are the same religion as me, and I wanted to give them correct information.
Jehovah's Witnesses are like normal people and just try to spread knowledge so everyone has the same oppurtunity.
by Melly :-) December 23, 2008
Get the Jehovah's Witnesses mug.