Mystery Wipe

There you are, comfortably seated, and just finished doing your business, when you realize, There Is No Freaking Toliet Paper! Karma has chosen this moment to give you that little payback you know you've got coming ;)

Presented with few cringworthy options, you notice the small waste basket your girl keeps next to the toilet. Therein lies the "Mystery Wipe."

Now this is a real gamble. Like a bad fortune cookie, you just don't know what you're gonna get. But, after pondering the alternative, you close your eyes and reluctantly dig-in, hoping for the best. We've ALL been there;)

Man, we ran out of toilet paper and I had to "go-fish" in the Mystery Wipe!

by Valhalla MMA May 13, 2019

High Wipe

When someone smells because they wipe their ass too high up and don't actually wipe anything, missing everything in the process and hence why they stink.
(Seen in Sextuplets movie)

"Oh he stinks"
"That's definitely a high wipe"

by Zline August 17, 2019

lucky butt wipe

when you wipe your butt and your finger breaks through and you get lucky

I was using some cheap toilet paper and had a lucky butt wipe

by AMan The Man January 21, 2016

gentleman's wipe

When a male is performing oral sex on a female and in one motion licks from the butthole to the clitoris. Variation of Gentlemen's Wipe.

1. Dude. Bro. Did you give her a gentleman's wipe?

2. She was so hot I gave her a gentleman's wipe.

3. I gave her a gentleman's wipe like a true gent.

by Brendan7891 March 7, 2012

Fresh wipe

A coworker who kisses the bosses ass so well that s/he leaves no stain or odor on the bosses behind.

Paul is such a fresh wipe! He can kiss Bobs' ass for hours at a time. (Names created for example purposes only.)

by Chitown winner September 3, 2013

Courtesy Wipe

When you need to wipe your ass mid day and head to the bathroom to finish the job

Kyle went to the bathroom half way through his shift to do a courtesy wipe

by Cheech Modene October 12, 2021

Pre-wipe

Using a moist baby wipe to swab the anus before taking a poop. A pre-wipe is primarily used to lubricate the anus for a more efficient and cleaner poop. The wipe can also be dropped into the toilet bowl after the swab to reduce back splash from the turds dropping into the bowl.

"Hey I'll be back in 20 minutes, I need to go clear this Indian food outta me." "Sounds good babe, don't forget to pre-wipe before letting it loose. You don't wanna have to shower again before we go out tonight." "Thanks for the reminder! Clean as a whistle!"

by ratpact4life October 1, 2018