The Toliet Song

A spoof of, "The Vagina Song" originally written by Willam Belli.
The misspelling of, "toliet" was done intentionally so that it has three syllables; it is pronounced, "toa'LYE-et".

Lyrics to The Toliet Song:

♫ Some of them are warm, Some of them are cold ♫
♫ Some are kind of scary, And this is what they're called ♫
♫ Toliiiiiet!(toliet) ♫
♫ Toliiiiieeet!(toliet) ♫
♫ They call that thing..toliet ♫
♫ Some belong to rich folk, They're really clean & bonged ♫
♫ But big or small I flush em'all ♫
♫ That's why I sing my song! ♫
♫ Toliiiiiet!(toliet) ♫
♫ Toliiiiieeet!(toliet) ♫
♫ They call that thing...toliet ♫
♫ Toliet! ♫
♫ Some smell really dirty, Like puke & shit and such ♫
♫ Some smell like a Massengill douche 'cause they've been scrubbed too much ♫
♫ Toliiiiiet!(toliet) ♫
♫ Toliiiiieeet!(toliet) ♫
♫ They call that thing...toliet ♫
♫ Toliiiiiet!(toliet) ♫
♫ Toliiiiieeet!(toliet) ♫
♫ They call that thing...toliet ♫
♫ Nothing could be finer than to pee on hard white china, in the morning! ♫

(yes, he needs to be taught how to pee IN the toliet, not ON the toliet!) :-O

by Telephony November 1, 2015

toliet bowl

A football game between two teams that are considered to suck and/or blow by general consensus.

"Hey John! Get the nachos and hard liquor, the Browns and Raiders are playing in the toliet bowl!"

by P. Dub December 29, 2006

Toliet Denver

How some people might speak, write, or type the name of the musician, "John Denver".

I mean think about it. A john is another word for a toliet.

Hey, didjya hear that Toliet Denver was on the radio this morning? Something about him putting cake on the griddle instead of in the oven and something about playing a violin.

by Telephony June 29, 2015

Toliet Terrorism

When someone shits in, pukes in, pisses in, and ejaculates in a toliet. This also often overflows the toliet or clogs it.

Dan: Why did you leave Joe’s house so early?
Mike: Bro I committed toliet terrorism and he can never know it was me.

by 15_MELO_7 July 25, 2018

toliet timer

this is where, the male is masturbating himself while the female is waiting to get a load in her face, but instead of a load, the male pisses in the females face, and sees how long he can piss without her throwing a fit, then recording the time.

"dude, last night, i got a new whore, and took the toliet timer to a 27 seconds!"

by whatthefuck69 January 20, 2009

toliet rocket

While mid-way during a shit, you sneez, which cause the shit to fly out of your ass like a rocket. If done correctly your ass hole should burn for 3-4 minutes as if a mexican just poured hot sauce right into you anal cavity

" my allerges were acting up in the port-o-potty and had this worst toliet rocket of my life!"

by Stephen Meehan June 15, 2008

toliet suprise

When you are taking a crap and you pee a little and your stream of pee goes between that small gap in between the toliet seat and toliet bowl.

Dude I just had a toliet suprise in your bathroom.

by somekidnamedjake February 24, 2009