ass shelf

any surface at around ass level that serves as a make shift seat. Common types of ass shelves are window sills, arms of chairs, any sort of ledge, and if your creative your friends. As the word "shelf" suggests in the term, ass shelves serve as the perfect place to store your ass when a regular chair just won't do the trick.

Queefy: " Oh hey, who would have known that your arm would make such a great seat! I could sit here for days."
Hoeleen:"Don't look at me...I'm not ok with being your ass shelf!"
Queefy: "Lies...your loving every second of being my ass shelf ;) ! "

by PresOfDaFriends June 18, 2011

Self ass smack

When you smack your ass yourself

heather: oh god why is the bedroom door locked (gets chainsaw and opens door)
leo: (having sex with sara) what the fuck heather
heather: ahh yes daddy this is some hot shit i've gotten horny i think
sara: uhm, ok but hes my fuckbuddy
heather: theres nothing wrong with me giving myself a self ass smack and then getting to fingering
mark: everyone here is a sex addict

by sir moron da great April 5, 2021

shell ass

A condition met when one refuses to wipe his ass after a messy turd for an extended period of time. The turds subsequently harden leaving the sufferer with a solid crust that mimics the appearance of a turtle's shell.

Can be effectively used for defensive purposes.

I've a kickboxing match coming up, I've got a solid case of shell ass to keep me safe.

by JahKnows November 27, 2016

Self Assassination

1.When one Assassinate's one's self.
2. The act or action of performing an Assassination on one's own self.
3. A more classier word for Suicide.

Guy 1: It tough to hear Jimmy committed suicide.
Guy 2: Think of it as an assassination.
Guy 1: What?
Guy 2: Jimmy assassinated himself.
Guy 1: Ahh so he committed a Self Assassination.

by CoUnMe April 22, 2010

Self-assurance

confidence in yourself and your abilities

But for girls who lack that armor of self-assurance, the insecurity I felt after reading Seventeen must have been even more unbearable.

by Weeheh October 14, 2014

self assisted euthanasia

1. Refers to suicide , used when you want to say the word less direct.


Add more to this... i can't think of anything else...

1. He just did a self assisted euthanasia

by akimbomidget December 13, 2004

Self - Assification

To make an ass out of yourself to get out of a horrible situation.

The quickest way to pull off a self-assification? Making an ass of yourself. Faking a massive bowel movement.

"After being asked to clean the yard, I did some self - assification by telling them I had explosive diarrhea."

"I had to work my self - assification to get out of cleaning the toilet yesterday"

by tomgreene March 4, 2010