pornometer

Measuring device in the study of pornology. Pornometers are primarily used by pornologists to determine how many P (1 Porn = .666667 inches) are in any given pornograph. The pornometer is a long device that is firmly attached to the scrote. Special care should be taken to calibrate it.

"Whoa I just received a pornogram from PetCo."
'Let me whip out my pornometer and appraise that for you'
"No, put that away; there are children here."

by Costco October 26, 2007

Lawn Pornament

Any seasonal lawn decoration that has been or can be used as a sex doll or sex toy. Can be inflatable or rigid and may or may not be modified to support deviant acts.

My grandma called the police when she saw a drunk college student from down the street defiling her prized inflatable Santa Claus. When the Police arrived, they found him passed out holding a Christmas elf. He had apparently sealed the deal with Donner, Prancer, Rudolph's mouth, and Frosty the Snow Man. When questioned, he claimed that he became addicted to Lawn Pornaments after dropping acid while watching a Family Guy marathon.

by tidycat72 December 8, 2009

porniest

One who is overly obsessed with porn, where the person loses all contact with anything other than a magazine, video, or internet involving porn. Someone who would rather watch porn than do anything else.

Keller is the porniest guy I know look at his dvd collection.

by Trea G. December 29, 2007

pornament

Pornographic Christmas tree ornaments depicting beloved seasonal figures in sexual positions, aka SantaBalls

Oh my god, will you look at that pornament! I always suspected Mrs. Claus had a thing for Rudolph and those elves. Now we really know why Rudolph's nose is always so bright at night!

by Springbreaker December 21, 2006

Blowing up Parliment

Something that, after viewing V for Vendetta, one may be inclined to talk about doing. Usually said person has no real political agenda, they just thought the movie scene was badass and would enjoy partaking in an equally cinematic experience. Though one may talk about blowing up Parliment, or even amass a group of people to do so, it is unlikely they will ever carry out their plans for fear of life in jail.

Tim saw V for Vendetta, and for a few days, he seemed preoccupied with the idea of blowing up Parliment. Upon eventually realizing that this action would not be as badass as in the movie and that it would ruin his life, Tim stopped recruiting people to fly to London and purchase C4 from the black market.

by 720mgSTEEEVE December 1, 2009

Pornament

An epic competition between (1) rival porn collections or (2) rival pornography artists; Derived from the words "Porn" and "Tournament".

Specific contests can include (for type 1, porn collections) comparisons of size, deviancy, quality and variety. For type 2 (rival porn stars) contests can include comparisons of size, deviancy, endurance, creativity, flexibility, precision and/or ability to induce a knockout blow.

(1) Ronnie was confident his years of porno collection could beat anyone; therefore he challenged his friends to a pornament.

(2) The rivalry between Jenna Jameson and Briana Banks was so intense it could best be described as a "pornament".

by Nick Vino December 24, 2008

Porncentrate

When viewing porn, you are oblivious to anything going on around you.

Dude, I've been calling you for 30 minutes, why didn't you pick up the phone?
Sorry man, I shut my phone off so I can porncentrate.

by Eugene Walnut February 2, 2009