Masterbathon

a masterbathon is a day that you stay home from school "sick" so you can beat off so many times that you are dry and chaffed and can't walk so the next day you have to stay home and do it all over again

Mike: "Damn jimmy has been out of school all week"
Steve: "I konw he must be having a masterbathon"

by LifeguardSteve April 27, 2004

Facebook Masturbator

This term is used to describe one who posts status updates, links, videos and or pictures, as well as other wall posts, and then goes on to "like" the posts. The indidual may have a phsycological disorder, as its obvious they like it. they posted it.

Tyler: "Did you see that Viggo is going to get the new Halo game tonight?"
Skylar: "Yeah, he posted it on facebook, and then he 'Liked' it."
Tyler: "He liked his own status? what a Facebook Masturbator ..."

by squirrelyJOE October 18, 2010

Post-Masturbatorial Urination

The piss most men take directly after masturbating (and orgasming) that hardly ever gets in the bowl, no matter how hard you try. It may splash against the walls, get on your clothing, all over the floor around the toilet, and the toilet seat, but rarely the actual toilet bowl.

Guy1: Dude, I just masturbated
Guy2: Did you take your post-masturbatorial urination yet?
Guy1: Yeah, it was horrible, my boxers are soaked and I spent 5 minutes wiping piss off my wall with toilet paper.

by Anusfist69 December 9, 2008

Masturbatory Index File

Is the systematic cataloging of persons of interest for later use as masturbation fantasy fodder. Elaborate indexes can be cross referenced by type of body, hair color, size of breasts ( if applicable ), bi-sexuality, sexual acts you envision them doing etc.

In public it can be referenced as " MI-File " pronounced MY-File

Masturbatory Index File example---"Those two women were so hot I added them to MI-File--and now they are bi-sexual and I'll be seeing them later tonight"

by knight1to1 August 2, 2009

masturbatory contingency

The natural mental ability all people possess that allows them to quickly and dynamically assess the situation and environment they are in to decide whether or not it is practical to masturbate at the exact moment in time.

My mother wasn't due to be back home for another 10 minutes, so I thought I'd slip in a quick wank. However, masturbatory contingency told me that it wasn't worth taking any chance of her walking in on me.

by Scekhcsy Foxmonk August 8, 2010

masturbator's cramp

Pain and swelling in the muscle around the mid-arm, elbow area which is caused by excessive masturbating. Not to be confused with Gamer's Wrist.

"Look at that huge whelp on Johnny's arm. Think he gets beaten?"

"Nah, it's probably Masturbator's Cramp."

by DesPERRYado April 21, 2005

Maskerbator

An individual devoid of reason and logic that tries to shame rational people into wearing a useless paper mask,especially in outdoor environments.

“Hey,let’s go give that jogger a hard time because he’s not wearing a mask outside”
“Go to Hell Karen....you’ve become nothing but a useless Maskerbator“.

by Skydash February 8, 2021