Johnny Appleseed

The sexual act where the woman lies on the ground with her legs over her head and the man places both testicles in the woman’s anus. This is best performed with large and hanging testicles.

How’s your sister’s asshole? Because I hit her with the Johnny Appleseed last night.

Man, her asshole was tight...that was a painful Johnny Appleseed I gave her.

by Kwaller11 September 30, 2017

Flag

Get the Johnny Appleseed mug.

Johnny Fappleseed

That fellow who circumvents his biological imperative and impregnates anything that will take his seed.

Dude, do it ON the couch, not to the couch. Fuckin' Johnny Fappleseed.

by Thizzlamicus August 27, 2011

Flag

Get the Johnny Fappleseed mug.

Johnny Appleseeds

A nickname used for a guy who hasn't the balls to stand up to his girlfriend or wife.

J.A.: I don't think she's going to let me go.
Buddy: Let you?? Listen here, Johnny Appleseeds... you go back in there and tell her you're playing poker with the guys tonight. If not, give me a call when you grow some apples down there.

by Sean Cookson August 24, 2007

Flag

Get the Johnny Appleseeds mug.

Johnny Appleweed

n. Mythical man who plants dope wherever he sees a need. Sometimes in a forest glen. Sometimes in a businessman’s pocket.

........

So you are telling me these reefers were put in your carry-on by someone named Johnny Appleweed?

by gnostic3 August 3, 2020

Flag

Get the Johnny Appleweed mug.

Johnny Appleweed

n. mythical figure who travels about the land whistling Grateful Dead tunes and planting marijuana seeds.

.......................

Dude! Look at what is coming up in the garden! I did not plant those man.

Looks like the work of Johnny Appleweed. Did you leave a bong under your pillow last week?

by gnostic3 August 2, 2020

Flag