The Gestapo arm of (inept) corporate middle management.
They enforce the law of the large corporate ladder in that you must not unintentionally threaten the job of anyone above you by outperforming them through hard work to deliver positive results for the organisation even if that hard work is necessitated by their ineptitude.
You must earn them their promotion first in order to "build relationships" so that they do not turn the corporate Gestapo onto you for investigation into your behaviour (a witch hunt in which you are accused) where the outcome is that your bridge will ultimately be burned and the inept corporate middle manager will not be found out until after your bridge has been burnt and they have staved of their eventual sacking from the hard work you have done in order to ensure positive outcomes for the organisation.
They enforce the law of the large corporate ladder in that you must not unintentionally threaten the job of anyone above you by outperforming them through hard work to deliver positive results for the organisation even if that hard work is necessitated by their ineptitude.
You must earn them their promotion first in order to "build relationships" so that they do not turn the corporate Gestapo onto you for investigation into your behaviour (a witch hunt in which you are accused) where the outcome is that your bridge will ultimately be burned and the inept corporate middle manager will not be found out until after your bridge has been burnt and they have staved of their eventual sacking from the hard work you have done in order to ensure positive outcomes for the organisation.
Employee: Holy Shit! This situation has led the organisation to be in a position where it cannot deliver to expectations.
Manager: Get it done Richard!
Employee: Right on it Sir/Madam. You can count on me.
Manager: Thanks Richard! Human Resources, please investigate Richard the nigger for not being in line with the mission and values of the organisation.
Corporate Gestapo: Ya Voll, Herr Middle Manager. You can count on us - we know the law and we are the law. We will performance manage this mofo because we are professionals.
Manager: Get it done Richard!
Employee: Right on it Sir/Madam. You can count on me.
Manager: Thanks Richard! Human Resources, please investigate Richard the nigger for not being in line with the mission and values of the organisation.
Corporate Gestapo: Ya Voll, Herr Middle Manager. You can count on us - we know the law and we are the law. We will performance manage this mofo because we are professionals.
by Honest Richard November 20, 2013
Get the Human Resources mug.A state benefit thief is a resource drainer.
A person employed in a role where they do very little work in exchange for a generous salary (usually large public organisations) is a resource drainer.
A person employed in a role where they do very little work in exchange for a generous salary (usually large public organisations) is a resource drainer.
by MontyBurns104 March 19, 2012
Get the Resource Drainer mug.Related Words
When you look at your past schoolwork/use Google to help you on a test or anything to do with school. It's not cheating.
Person 1: Why are you looking up the answers? That's cheating!
Person 2: I'm just using my resources!
Person 1: Oh, you're right!
Person 2: You should be using your resources too.
Person 2: I'm just using my resources!
Person 1: Oh, you're right!
Person 2: You should be using your resources too.
by maddytheweirdo April 23, 2020
Get the using your resources mug.A pompous job title self-servingly contrived by human resource (HR) "professionals" to be applied to themselves, obviously intended to justify the existence and further expansion of the HR function within business organizations. A further objective of this ruse appears to be propagation of the illusion that the HR function possesses a holistic grasp of broader strategic issues facing the organization enabling it to contribute expanded economic value and thereby providing justification for elevated compensation demands for HR staff.
A look at online job advertisements will confirm that the use of this title is spreading faster than a California wildfire, giving credence to the notion that this scheme was recently cooked up in some HR industry association initiative as a way to rebrand HR "professionals" as being more than the administrative paper pushers they, in fact, are.
The absurdity of this inflated moniker is further appreciated when one considers that no other functions appear to have widely implemented similar titles in their functions. For example, one seldom sees job postings for bizarre titles such as "engineering business partner", "sales business partner", or "legal business partner".
A look at online job advertisements will confirm that the use of this title is spreading faster than a California wildfire, giving credence to the notion that this scheme was recently cooked up in some HR industry association initiative as a way to rebrand HR "professionals" as being more than the administrative paper pushers they, in fact, are.
The absurdity of this inflated moniker is further appreciated when one considers that no other functions appear to have widely implemented similar titles in their functions. For example, one seldom sees job postings for bizarre titles such as "engineering business partner", "sales business partner", or "legal business partner".
Castle: "Hey Russo, what's with that new idiotic title of yours I saw on LinkedIn? Human Resources Business Partner? You've got to be kidding me."
Russo: "Come on Frank, it's a title to reflect the greater value I bring to the business."
Castle: "Jesus, Billy, you and I both know you that you don't know a damn thing about business and that the only reason you’re in HR is because you flunked out of all the other departments."
Russo: "Come on Frank, it's a title to reflect the greater value I bring to the business."
Castle: "Jesus, Billy, you and I both know you that you don't know a damn thing about business and that the only reason you’re in HR is because you flunked out of all the other departments."
by Clark F. Kent March 21, 2019
Get the Human Resources Business Partner mug.The sort of people who, when considering CVs of job applicants, remove from the list people who are better than them, just to protect their jobs. Devious evil scum, who are in personnel or human resources because they have fucked up every other job, fucked the General Manager or both.
The sort of people who, when considering job applicants to run post-invasion Iraq, would consider Saddam Hussien, Fidel Castro or Robert Mugabe, as a) They all hold Doctorates. b) "Have relevant experience and contacts." c) Have done the job before.
by gremlin February 22, 2005
Get the Human Resources mug.by spur November 17, 2013
Get the resource hog mug.A website in which you can find Photoshop resources. Including brushes, patterns, textures, and a bunch more stuff. You can also find Photoshop tutorials, and occasionally some downloads. These sites are usually owned by one person, but sometimes have co owners and shit. The owner should be in there teen (or tween) years, and anyone below is a fucking pathetic piece of shit. Resource Site owners are awesome, and if your going to go to there site, you should probably get to know them. The owners of Resource Sites are future graphic designers. Resource Sites came to be because of Myspace, but since that shit is ruined, theyre all around Facebook now. If you look in there signs, you'll see a sitemodel. Look it up if you dont understand.
Daaammnnn! Sandras resource site is THE sexiest I've ever seen!
Fuck man, this bitches resource site sucks charlie sheens imaginary balls.
Fuck man, this bitches resource site sucks charlie sheens imaginary balls.
by FUCKYOURSHITFACESBITCH October 24, 2011
Get the Resource Site mug.