French press

A sexual move where one person starts to take a crap and a second person immediately shoves his dick or a dildo in the first person's ass to press the shit back in.

At the party she felt a turd poking out, so she asked me to follow her into the bathroom and give her a French press. Unfortunately she skooked in her panties later.

by Doctor Shakalu June 24, 2008

French Press

The art of dipping down from a squat position and smashing ones dirty muff on a person's face.

Oh man, Joe passed out by the fire, so the girls all took there time giving him a french press.

by Kingstoncowboy July 13, 2019

French Press

To squeeze the liquid out of a turd, using one's underwear, and into someone's mouth.

That four-dollar hooker let me French Press her twice!

by scala5k March 13, 2005

French Pressing

A yet unknown sexual practice coined by Kevin Pereira of Attack of the Show fame that somehow involves coffee.

Kevin: Why do they sell coffee at the Hustler store?
Olivia: You don't wanna know, it ain't for drinkin'...
Kevin: I get it.
Olivia: ... What's it for, then?
Kevin: French Pressing? Could be a move, I dunno, Urban Dictionary it. I'll add it tonight.
Too slow, motherfucker.

by ToriRose February 8, 2010

French Press

Process by which a constipated female puts a finger up her vagina and pushes it out her anus.

Jill: Ah I'm so constipated Michelle

Michelle: Try the french press! It helps me all the time!

by captain Swagger October 13, 2011

French Press

The act of sharting while tea bagging.

I was tea bagging Veronica when I felt a fart coming on. When I let it loose, I accidentally sharted all over her face. She laughed it off and thanked me for giving her her first french press.

by askldfjhh January 14, 2010

French Press

The act of one gentleman taking another naked gentleman, who is sitting indian-style, and bench pressing him. This is preferably done so that the scrotum is placed in the mouth and the nose is placed in the anus during the workout.

Disclaimer: Not recommended for normal gym hours

"Hey bro you want to help me with a french press? Sweet. Take off your pants."
"I was offered a french press by my priest. It wasn't was i expected."
"What the fuck! I thought you meant coffee!!"

by thejockjizzle August 13, 2014