farting with confidence

When you're worried that if you fart you'll accidentally shit in your pants (aka draw mud).

"I never got sick in India, but there were definitely some patches where I wasn't farting with confidence!"

"They have an awesome chilli paste which on many occasions has stopped me farting with confidence."

by captainlarry February 8, 2010

Retard Farming

Retard farming is the act of collecting government money by housing retards and keeping them in poor living conditions, therefore, saving most of the money collected for yourself.

Retard farming can be done in a variety of different ways; here is one of the more rustic examples:
Step 1: Buy a farm.
Step 2: Collect retards from government programs.
Step 3: Put said retards on farm.
Step 4: Allow them to graze the lands in a retarded stupor.
Step 5: Collect government money and become filthy fucking rich.

Farmer 1: "It's been a tough season for retard farming. I heard Farmer Yimie lost 3 retards last week after one of them went all crazy like in a blinded retard rage and killed the others."

Farmer 2: "Well I heard Farmer Eveland lost his whole stock! They dun' got trapped in the barn while in burnt down. Yep, siree! Them retards dun' been so stupid they couldn't figure out how to open the barn door!"

by Jak Jones September 4, 2011

midget farming

A celebratory act started in the early 70's by oprah and family, where midgets are hunted, and then corraled into small pens where they are forced to perform circus tricks. This form of entertainment is no longer practiced by oprah, but is still enjoyed by the mentally ill, alcoholics, and wealthy housewives

"Wow the midget farming was incredible last night, those little guys can really dance!"

by chachaddict April 17, 2009

hog farming

When a gentleman goes out for the night and has a plan to only chase robust women.

Jack Smith says, "Check out the piggy over their in the corner". Rodger says, "do you mean that 400 pound girl?" Jack Smith says,"Hell yeah buddy. I'm gonna do a little Hog Farming".

by Joey Bosco September 12, 2016

Quandale Dingleberry james bartholomew the 3rd farting anderson

A hot guy

Man he looks a lot like Quandale Dingleberry james bartholomew the 3rd farting anderson right now

by IzzerYes April 16, 2022

synchronized farting

A special skill that usually evolves between very close friends or siblings, often those who are bored.

We had become famous by the age of twelve as our small town’s synchronized farting champions.

by Dr Bunnygirl July 20, 2019

Morse farting

Named after inventor Samuel Morse, patterns of flatulence consisting of dits and dahs which can also be transcribed, most commonly onto toilet paper in the form of dots and dashes.

From his earliest youth my father demonstrated an innate talent for Morse farting for which he was, much later in his long and charmed life, eventually formally recognized for his feats of brilliant farting.

by Dr Bunnygirl June 30, 2020